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These days, it is getting more and more difficult for people to enjoy living in cities. Why is this? What can the government do to make city life more enjoyable?

These days, it is getting more and more difficult for people to enjoy living in cities. Why is this? What can the government do to make city life more enjoyable? 6aXr0
A generation ago the city was beautiful, clean and well maintained. However at present the city is not very much suitable to live in. This essay will took at the core reasons for this and purpose and solid solutions. One of the main cause of the is over population. By this I mean to say that most of the people from other cities come to this city to pursue a better life or facilities. For example, there is a multinational company which is situated in this city, people comes to get a job there for better life and facilities. This could be prevented if the government take initiatives that people get all the facilities there. Another problem is traffic. Which is increasing immensely. That is because of being populated there have increased the number of transportation for the use of public to reach their destination o time. If the government increases the number of public transport then the use of personal transportation will be less which will help to reduce the traffic problem. A third reason of this problem is not getting the proper facilities in need. Humans basically have five basic need. Those are food, health, education, shelter and clothes. But most of the facilities are based to the capital city. For example if one need better treatment they are referred directly to the city hospital. If this problem is solved the tendency to come to this city will reduce by some percentage. So it can be said that nowadays its hard for individuals to appreciate in city life.
A generation ago the city was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
, clean and well maintained.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
at present the city is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much suitable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in. This essay will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "take"
took
at the core reasons for this and purpose and solid solutions.

One of the main cause of the is over population. By this I mean to say that most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to this city to pursue a better life or facilities.
For example
, there is a multinational
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
which
is situated
in this city,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
comes
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a job there for better life and facilities. This could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevented
if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
take initiatives that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
all the facilities there.

Another problem is traffic. Which is increasing
immensely
.
That is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
being populated
there have increased the number of transportation for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of public to reach their destination o time. If the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
increases the number of public transport then the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of personal transportation will be less which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the traffic problem.

A third reason of this problem is not getting the proper facilities in need. Humans
basically
have five basic need. Those are food, health, education, shelter and clothes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
most of the facilities
are based
to the capital city.
For example
if one need better treatment they
are referred
directly
to the city hospital.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
this problem
is solved
the tendency to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to this city will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
percentage.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it can
be said
that nowadays its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for individuals to appreciate in city life.

IELTS academic These days, it is getting more and more difficult for people to enjoy living in cities. Why is this? What can the government do to make city life more enjoyable?

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
260 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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