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The two Pie Charts show the usage of different source for generator energy into different years

The two Pie Charts show the usage of different source for generator energy into different years K33nR
The circular charts depict the percentage of power created by various means in a meticulous nation from 1985 to 2003. Overall makes it conspicuous that the maturity amount of energy was generated by oil and least amount of power was manufactured by those sources who were abled to renovate again in the given span. By scrutinizing the pie charts, it is vividly infarred that in both figure the contribution of oil in production energy was burgeoned in 1985 as well as in 2003 with the percentage of 52% in initial year. On the contrary it collapsed in 2003 by 13%. Furthermore, the involvement of of nuclear means in the construction of power was plummet by 5% in 2003 from its starting ratio(22%). Eventually, natural gas was consumed in output of energy by 13% in 1985 and policy related with one -tenth percent I'm in the last given year. Analysing further, the utilisation of coal and alternative renewable sources were search with a tiny fraction in 2003 that was 13% and 4% orderly. Lastly the usage of hydrogen was plateaued with the amount of 4 percentage in both years.
The circular charts depict the percentage of power created by various means in a meticulous nation from 1985 to 2003.

Overall
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it conspicuous that the maturity amount of energy
was generated
by oil and least amount of power
was manufactured
by those sources who were
Possible spelling mistake found.
abled
to renovate again in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
span.

By scrutinizing the pie charts, it is
vividly
Possible spelling mistake found.
infarred
that in both figure the contribution of oil in production energy
was burgeoned
in 1985
Probable usage error. Use "and" after 'both'.
as well as
in 2003 with the percentage of 52% in initial year.
On the contrary
it collapsed in 2003 by 13%.
Furthermore
, the involvement
Possible typo: you repeated a word
of of
nuclear means in the construction of power was plummet by 5% in 2003 from its starting ratio(22%).
Eventually
, natural gas
was consumed
in output of energy by 13% in 1985 and policy related with one -tenth percent I'm in the last
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
year.

Possible spelling mistake. 'Analysing' is British English.
Analysing
further
, the
Possible spelling mistake. 'utilisation' is British English.
utilisation
of coal and alternative renewable sources were search with a tiny fraction in 2003 that was 13% and 4% orderly.
Lastly
the usage of hydrogen
was plateaued
with the amount of 4 percentage in both years.
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IELTS academic The two Pie Charts show the usage of different source for generator energy into different years

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
188 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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