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The two pie charts compare the women's top education level in two different years, 1945 and 1995, in Homeland.

The two pie charts compare the women's top education level in two different years, 1945 and 1995, in Homeland. eMJG
The two pie charts compare the women's top education level in two different years, 1945 and 1995, in Homeland. As is portrayed in the given illustration, Someland's women made remarkable progress in education in 1995 than that of 1945. Overall, a noticeable change was reciting in the rank of instructive accomplishment of females in Homeland during a 50 years duration. Whereas in 1945, the rate of "no discipline ", "third grade", and "year 6" made up the ancestors of the total, there was an unpolished after mediety a century as these three categories completely vanish on the chart. Firstly, the ladies' education scenario in Homeland in 1945 was formidable as there was no graduate woman and only 1% of females who realized their first degree this year. In 1945, females who did not finish even the 12th seminar position involved 95% of total females. 35% of these females never went to shoal at all. On the inconsistent, the ladies instruction in Homeland after 50 forever certify a noticeable improvement. In this year, all ladies in Homeland path to reprove and realized at least 9th grade. The factorage of women over(predicate) their first grade was part of the entire Maness. 20% of females perfected their inform-scale at that delay which was significant in the women's word in 1945.
The two pie charts compare the women's top education level in two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
years, 1945 and 1995, in
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Homeland
. As
is portrayed
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
illustration,
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Someland
's women made remarkable progress in education in 1995 than that of 1945.

Overall
, a noticeable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
was reciting in the rank of instructive accomplishment of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Homeland
during a 50 years duration. Whereas in 1945, the rate of
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
no discipline
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
,
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
third grade
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
, and
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
year 6
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
made up the ancestors of the total, there was an unpolished after
Possible spelling mistake found.
mediety
a century as these three categories completely vanish on the chart.

Firstly
, the ladies' education scenario in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Homeland
in 1945 was formidable as there was no graduate woman and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
1% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
who realized their
first
degree this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. In 1945,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
who did not finish even the 12th seminar position involved 95% of total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
. 35% of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
never went to shoal at all.

On the inconsistent, the
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "ladies'" or "lady's"?
ladies
instruction in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Homeland
after 50 forever certify a noticeable improvement. In this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
, all ladies in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Homeland
path to reprove and realized at least 9th grade. The
Possible spelling mistake found.
factorage
of women over(predicate) their
first
grade was part of the entire
Possible spelling mistake found.
Maness
. 20% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
perfected their inform-scale at that delay which was significant in the women's word in 1945.
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IELTS academic The two pie charts compare the women's top education level in two different years, 1945 and 1995, in Homeland.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
217 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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Lexical Resource: 5.0
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Grammatical Range: 6.5
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Task Achievement: 5.0
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