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The two graphs show the main sources of energy in the USA in the 1980s and the 1990s. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the changes which occurred. » Write at least 150 words. Sources of Energy, USA, in the 1980s and 1990s.

The two pie charts illustrates the different proportion of electric energy production, which is a major source of energy between 1970 and 1984 in USA. It also provides figures including natural gas, hydro-electric power, coal, nuclear and oil. Overall, it is evident that, a significant increase in the proportion of Nuclear can be noticed over the period while oil consistently accounted for the same proportion that is 5% in both of the years. First of all, the percentage of energy produced by coal started at just over 55. 50% in 1970. Besides, this figure then rose slightly to reach a peak of almost 55. 5% in the year of 1984. Intriguingly, before 1984 the number of hydroelectric power falling drastically to 13. 7% in the following year. In terms of oil the rate remained relatively stable in both of the years about 5% and 5% respectively. However, the proportion of nuclear climbed gradually to peak at about 13. 5 % in 1984.
The two pie charts illustrates the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of electric energy production, which is a major source of energy between 1970 and 1984
A determiner is probably missing here: “in the USA”.
in USA
. It
also
provides figures including natural gas, hydro-electric power, coal, nuclear and oil.

Overall
, it is evident that, a significant increase in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of Nuclear can
be noticed
over the period while oil
consistently
accounted for the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
that is
5% in both of the years.

Often, this adverbial phrase is redundant. Consider using “first”.
First of all
, the percentage of energy produced by coal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 55. 50% in 1970.
Besides
, this figure then rose
slightly
to reach a peak of almost 55. 5% in the year of 1984.
Intriguingly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
1984 the number of hydroelectric power falling
drastically
to 13. 7% in the following year.

In terms of oil the rate remained
relatively
stable in both of the years about 5% and 5%
respectively
.
However
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of nuclear climbed
gradually
to peak at about 13. 5 % in 1984.
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IELTS academic The two graphs show the main sources of energy in the USA in the 1980s and the 1990s. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the changes which occurred. » Sources of Energy, USA, in the 1980s and 1990s.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
162 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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