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the table gives information about information about department abd online stores in AUSRALIA in 2011

the table gives information about information about department abd online stores in AUSRALIA in 2011 K31V0
The tabular chart illustrates the comparative information about how much proportion invest of various companies on sale revenue and profit gain from department stores and online stores in Australia over the period of 2011. From an overall perspective, it is readily apparent that, majority of companies utilized wired method to sale their product and spend more than offline market, while, offline stores gained more profit and growth was far better than wired market. In terms of online stores precisely 368 which was more then 5 times of (67) offline stores, online stores spend 13, 400 Australian dollars on sales revenue, while, 863 Australian dollars comes from sales. Only 6% growth come from online stores in 2011. Turing to department stores, It gained 807 Australian dollars which was only 55 less than online stores and sales revenue exactly 12, 700 AUD however, 4% growth gained from offline stores over the period of 211
The tabular chart illustrates the comparative information about how much proportion invest of various

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies


on sale

revenue and profit gain from department stores

and online

stores

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
Australia over the period of 2011.

From an
overall


perspective, it is
readily


apparent that, majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies


utilized wired

method to sale

their product and spend more than offline market, while, offline stores

gained more profit and growth was far better than wired

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
market
.

In terms of online

stores

precisely


368 which was more
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
then


5 times of (67) offline stores, online

stores

spend 13, 400 Australian dollars on sales

revenue, while, 863 Australian dollars
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
from
sales.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only


6% growth
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come


from online

stores

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
2011.

Turing to department stores, It gained 807 Australian dollars which was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only


55 less than online

stores

and sales

revenue exactly

12, 700 AUD
however
, 4% growth gained from offline stores

over the period of 211
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IELTS academic the table gives information about information about department abd online stores in AUSRALIA in 2011

Academic
  American English
35 paragraphs
151 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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