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the regional incidences of household recycling

the regional incidences of household recycling 73RP5
The above giving line graph illustrates the regional incidences of household recycling for the following three countries which is UK, France and Germany from 2005 to 2015 Overall, it is clearly that there was dynamic changes in recycling incidences especially in both the UK and France, In 2005 the recycling rates hit the bottom in Germany while the UK reached the peak rate of recycling in 2015. obviously the given chart demonstrates that both of UK and Germany in constant upward growth, while France in continuous decline in recycling rates till 2013 were it was raised up dramatically and gone upwardly. finally it is worth to mention that, in 2008 both France and UK were approximately met and get nearly equalized in incidences of household recycling. UK and Germany both of them demonstrate and going up trend, firstly, in 2005 UK showed rate of recycling as nearly 35 percent and Germany was exactly 20 out of a hundred, after that both countries kept going upwards obviously till 2015 where UK peaked with a rate of 60% whereas Germany hit the peak at approximately 58 percent. clearly noticed that UK demonstrated some of fluctuation especially in 2009 and 2011 while the UK remained steady through out the entire period from 2005 till 2015. In opposite to UK and Germany, France provided a unique and downward trend, in 2005 France started with recycling rate at exactly 50% where it was the highest in comparison to others countries, after that it remained in a continuous decline till 2013 where hit down the bottom as exactly 30 out of a hundred. However, after that France's curve dramatically turned up and reached a recycling rate as 40% in 2015
The above giving line graph illustrates the regional incidences of household
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
for the following three countries which is UK, France and Germany from 2005 to 2015

Overall
, it is
clearly
that there was dynamic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
incidences
especially
in both the UK and France, In 2005 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
hit the bottom in Germany while the UK reached the peak
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
in 2015.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
obviously
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
chart demonstrates that both of UK and Germany in constant upward growth, while France in continuous decline in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
till 2013 were it
was raised
up
dramatically
and gone
upwardly
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
finally
it is worth to mention that, in 2008 both France and UK were approximately met and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
nearly
equalized in incidences of household recycling.

UK and Germany both of them demonstrate and going up trend,
firstly
, in 2005 UK
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
as
nearly
35 percent and Germany was exactly 20 out of a hundred, after that both countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
going upwards
obviously
till 2015 where UK peaked with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of 60% whereas Germany hit the peak at approximately 58 percent.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
clearly
noticed that UK demonstrated
Consider using "some fluctuation" or "some of the fluctuation".
some of fluctuation
especially
in 2009 and 2011 while the UK remained steady
Did you mean "throughout"?
through out
the entire period
Nonstandard phrase. Did you mean: "from 2005 to 2015"?
from 2005 till 2015
.

In opposite to UK and Germany, France provided a unique and downward trend, in 2005 France
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
at exactly 50% where it was the highest
in comparison
to others countries, after that it remained in a continuous decline till 2013 where hit down the bottom as exactly 30 out of a hundred.
However
, after that France's curve
dramatically
turned up and reached a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
as 40% in 2015
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IELTS academic the regional incidences of household recycling

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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