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the proportion of traverlers used bus, car, bike

the proportion of traverlers used bus, car, bike LLpq8
The graph illustrates the proportion of traverlers used bus, car, bike to betake in European city from 1950 to 1990. Overall, it is evident that there was an improve in the use of cars for traverlling while the popularity of other modes of transport were declined since 1950. The percentage of users using cars increase significantly, its approximately from 7% in 1950 to 25% in 1970, and nearly reach to 40% in 1990. Nevertheless, the number of people using bikes reduced. Over 25% of commuters cycled in 1950, but it was considerablely deacreased to 8% in 1990. Its cearly to see that, the amount of population who walked fallen down from 35% in 1950 to 10% in 1990. The chart shows the favorites of people in European to cars, on the other hand bikes and walks couldnt be like that.
The graph illustrates the proportion of
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traverlers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
bus,
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car
, bike to betake in European city from 1950 to 1990.

Overall
, it is evident that there was an
The word 'improve' is not a noun. Did you mean "improvement"?
improve
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
for
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traverlling
while the popularity of other modes of transport
were declined
since 1950.

The percentage of users using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
increase
significantly
, its approximately from 7% in 1950 to 25% in 1970, and
nearly
reach to 40% in 1990.
Nevertheless
, the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
using bikes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
. Over 25% of commuters cycled in 1950,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it was
Possible spelling mistake found.
considerablely
Possible spelling mistake found.
deacreased
to 8% in 1990. Its
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cearly
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that, the amount of population who walked fallen down from 35% in 1950 to 10% in 1990.

The chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the favorites of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in European to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
,
on the other hand
bikes and walks
Possible spelling mistake found
couldnt
be like that.
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IELTS academic the proportion of traverlers used bus, car, bike

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
140 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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