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The presented charts illustrate the proportion of domestic electrical appliances and the amount of time allocated to do household chores in families of an unidentified country from 1920 to 2019.

The presented charts illustrate the proportion of domestic electrical appliances and the amount of time allocated to do household chores in families of an unidentified country from 1920 to 2019. 3boD5
The presented charts illustrate the proportion of domestic electrical appliances and the amount of time allocated to do household chores in families of an unidentified country from 1920 to 2019. As can be seen clearly, there was an upward trend in the ownership of 3 different appliances, while the opposite was true for the number of housework hours. Additionally, it seemed that the refrigerator had witnessed the most significant change over the shown years. To be specific, in 1920, there was no refrigerator appeared in any family. By contrast, washing machines and vacuum cleaners were available in 40% and 30% of surveyed households respectively, equivalently 50 total housework hours. Over the following years, both figures experienced a gradual rise with the latter surpassing the former in 1960 at precisely 70%, reaching 100% at the end, whereas washing machine data merely stopped at 73%. Meanwhile, fridge equipment was utilized in most of the assessed families in 2019. As for the second chart, over the first 60 years witnessed a dramatic drop in household working hours, hitting the low of nearly 18% in 1980. In 1980 onwards, there was a short recovery before decreasing to around 10 hours of doing housework in the end of surveyed years.
The presented charts illustrate the proportion of domestic electrical appliances and the amount of time allocated to do household chores in families of an unidentified country from 1920 to 2019.

As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
clearly
, there was an upward trend in the ownership of 3
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
appliances, while the opposite was true for the number of housework
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
.
Additionally
, it seemed that the refrigerator had witnessed the most significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
over the shown years.

To be specific, in 1920, there was no refrigerator appeared in any family. By contrast, washing machines and vacuum cleaners were available in 40% and 30% of surveyed households
respectively
,
equivalently
50 total housework
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
. Over the following years, both figures experienced a gradual rise with the latter surpassing the former in 1960 at
precisely
70%, reaching 100% at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, whereas washing machine data
merely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
at 73%. Meanwhile, fridge equipment
was utilized
in most of the assessed families in 2019.

As for the second chart, over the
first
60 years witnessed a dramatic drop in household working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
, hitting the low of
nearly
18% in 1980. In 1980 onwards, there was a short recovery
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
decreasing to around 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
of doing housework in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of surveyed years.
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IELTS academic The presented charts illustrate the proportion of domestic electrical appliances and the amount of time allocated to do household chores in families of an unidentified country from 1920 to 2019.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
205 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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