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The number of vistors went to two music website

The number of vistors went to two music website lLa8K
The line graph describes how many people visited to Music Choice and Pop Parade from Day1 to Day15 in 2018. Overall, it can be seen that the number of visiors going to Pop Parade and Music Choice increased considerably. Firstly, there was dramtic decline from 110 000 to 40 000 visitors visting Pop Parade from Day1 to Day7. Then the number of people who went to here stay steady in the next two day. The period of Day9 from Day 15 observed a wild fluctuation in that number and the trend was upward from 40000 to about 150 000 people. That number reached a peak of175000 in Day 15. On the orther hand, people going to Music choice witnessed fluctuated but the trend was downward in the first 11 days followed by a period of increase in four days later. The number of visitors was from 30000 in day11 to 60000 in day15. The highest vistors of Mucsic choice was over 120000 in day 14.
The line graph
describes
how
many
people
visited to Music
Choice
and Pop Parade from Day1 to Day15 in 2018.
Overall
, it can be
seen
that the
number
of
visiors
going to Pop Parade and Music
Choice
increased
considerably
.
Firstly
, there was
dramtic
decline from 110 000 to 40 000 visitors
visting
Pop Parade from Day1 to Day7. Then the
number
of
people
who
went to here
stay steady in the
next
two day. The period of Day9 from Day 15 observed a wild fluctuation in that
number
and the trend was upward from 40000 to about 150 000
people
. That
number
reached a peak of175000 in Day 15. On the
orther
hand,
people
going to Music
choice
witnessed fluctuated
but
the trend was downward in the
first
11 days followed by a period of increase in four days later. The
number
of visitors was from 30000 in day11 to 60000 in day15. The highest
vistors
of
Mucsic
choice
was over 120000 in day 14.
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IELTS academic The number of vistors went to two music website

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
165 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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