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the number of library books read by the boy and the girls from 2009 to 2012

the number of library books read by the boy and the girls from 2009 to 2012 26mow
The number of library books read by boys and girls at Starmouth School from 2006 to the present is illustrated by the graph below. In 2009, the start of the boy was higher than the girl approximately twenty books and this situation last one year at 2010. During one year from 2009 to 2010, the was a slight increase in the book read by boys and girls. In 2010, the boy still read more books than the girls but one year later, the graph shows that the increase of the girl was so dramatic. It was even the same number as the book read by the boy and kept rising up significantly in 2012. Meanwhile, in 2011, the number of the boy read book was a gradual growth and reached a peak in 2011. After that in 2012, it was a decline and the as same number as itself in 2011. Overall, the was an upward trend for the girl and a downward trend for the boy.
The
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number
of library
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books
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read
by
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boys
and
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girls
at
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Starmouth
School from 2006 to the present
is illustrated
by the graph below. In 2009, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boy
was higher than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girl
approximately twenty
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books
and this situation last one year at 2010. During one year from 2009 to 2010,
Please check whether a word is missing between 'the' and 'was' or whether 'the' is the correct determiner.
the
was a slight increase in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
read
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
. In 2010, the
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boy
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
read
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
one year later, the graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that the increase of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girl
was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
dramatic. It was even the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
read
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boy
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
rising up
significantly
in 2012. Meanwhile, in 2011, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
read
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
was a gradual growth and reached a peak in 2011. After that in 2012, it was a decline and the as same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
as itself in 2011.
Overall
,
Please check whether a word is missing between 'the' and 'was' or whether 'the' is the correct determiner.
the
was an upward trend for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girl
and a downward trend for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boy
.
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IELTS academic the number of library books read by the boy and the girls from 2009 to 2012

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
167 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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