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The map illustrates the development which took place in a town in northern Vietnam between 1995 and present.

The map illustrates the development which took place in a town in northern Vietnam between 1995 and present. pexAm
The map illustrates the development which took place in a town in northern Vietnam between 1995 and present. In general, the most significant change in the town occured in the north of the landscape, with the conversion of the farmland and forest park into the sport complex featuring a golf course and two tennis courts If we look at the north of the town, in 1995, there was a large farmland and forest park, but during 25 years, it has been knocked down and replaced by a golf and tennis complex. It is noticeable that there has been an expansion into the west of the road surrounding the four houses. On the opposite side, there witnessed the conversion of five shops into five restaurants. As can be seen in the southern area, while the hotel and cafe have remained unchanged, it is noticeable that the new car park has been introduced next to the hotel to accommodate more guests. On the other hand, the fishing port has been completely removed and the fish market has been turned into a sea-view apartment.
The map illustrates the development which took place in a town in northern Vietnam between 1995 and present.

In general
, the most significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the town
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "occurred", the past tense form of the verb 'occur'?
occured
in the north of the landscape, with the conversion of the farmland and forest park into the sport complex featuring a golf course and two tennis courts

If we look at the north of the town, in 1995, there was a large farmland and forest park,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
during 25 years, it has
been knocked
down and replaced by a golf and tennis complex. It is noticeable that there has been an expansion into the west of the road surrounding the four
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
. On the opposite side, there witnessed the conversion of five shops into five restaurants.

As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the southern area, while the hotel and
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
have remained unchanged, it is noticeable that the new car park has
been introduced
next
to the hotel to accommodate more guests.
On the other hand
, the fishing port has been completely removed and the fish market has
been turned
into a sea-view apartment.

IELTS academic The map illustrates the development which took place in a town in northern Vietnam between 1995 and present.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
181 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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