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The map depicts two pictures of a public park: the first image of the park is from 1928, and the second one is of recent time.

The map depicts two pictures of a public park: the first image of the park is from 1928, and the second one is of recent time. kg1g8
Overall, in the place of fountains and music stage, a new rose garden and a huge amphitheater are made, and a coffee hub along with a children's play area is also new construction in the park. in detail, the fountain and small music stage for artists used to be the main attraction of the park during 1920. However, now both places are changed: the music stage is made into a big concert hall at the west of the park and the fountain in the center of the park is replaced by a square rose garden, and seats are available for visitors to sit around the garden. Furthermore, in 1920, there used to be a rose garden and a pond particularly for water plants at the northeast corner, which is now constructed into a play area for children, plus a cafe is built right next to the play area, in place of the rose garden. in addition, the southeastern part glasshouse is now a water feature
Overall
, in the place of fountains and music stage, a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
and a huge amphitheater
are made
, and a coffee hub along with a children's play area is
also
new construction in the park.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
detail, the fountain and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
music stage for artists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to be the main attraction of the park during 1920.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
both places are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
: the music stage
is made
into a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
concert hall at the west of the park and the fountain in the center of the park
is replaced
by a square
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
, and seats are available for visitors to sit around the garden.

Furthermore
, in 1920, there
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
and a pond
particularly
for water plants at the northeast corner, which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
constructed into a play area for children, plus a
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
is built
right
next
to the play area, in place of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
addition, the southeastern part glasshouse is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
a water
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
feature

IELTS academic The map depicts two pictures of a public park: the first image of the park is from 1928, and the second one is of recent time.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
164 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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