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the map below shows the development of a particular area between 1965 and the present day

the map below shows the development of a particular area between 1965 and the present day pX5M0
The layout demonstrates the development of a residential area between 1965 and the present day. As an overall trend, up until now, there are more places for housing areas and buildings, while a road has been connected to make way for transportation. In 1965, in the left side of the map, there were numerous trees, on the contrary they have been removed into a car park nowadays. Meanwhile, a smaller car park at the opposite side of the diagram has appeared, which has a tiny thoroughfare connecting to the boulevard bridge. Because of the significant development of the city, there is a huge different in the number of housing space and buildings compared to the past. In 1965, there were not many houses, but at the moment, there are lots of modern apartments, houses occupying at the corner of the map. Moreover, in 1965, there was a road in the center of the picture, with a ferry in the river, which were extremely tortuous and hazardous for people at that time to move. However, the ferry has currently been displaced to connect the lane with the city. Furthermore, many housing areas have been expanded along the river side. In the future, the city is planning to construct a foot bridge under the road bridge, with a new match marina and a car park in the East South of the layout for serving the citizens' entertainment.
The layout demonstrates the development of a residential area between 1965 and the present day. As an
overall
trend, up until
now
, there are more places for housing areas and buildings, while a road has
been connected
to
make
way for transportation. In 1965, in the
left
side of the map, there were numerous trees,
on the contrary
they have
been removed
into a car park nowadays. Meanwhile, a smaller car park at the opposite side of the diagram has appeared, which has a tiny thoroughfare connecting to the boulevard bridge.
Because
of the significant development of the city, there is a huge
different
in the number of housing space and buildings compared to the past. In 1965, there were not
many
houses
,
but
at the moment, there are lots of modern apartments,
houses
occupying at the corner of the map.
Moreover
, in 1965, there was a road in the center of the picture, with a ferry in the river, which were
extremely
tortuous and hazardous for
people
at that time to
move
.
However
, the ferry has
currently
been displaced
to connect the lane with the city.
Furthermore
,
many
housing areas have
been expanded
along the river side. In the future, the city is planning to construct a foot bridge under the road bridge, with a new match marina and a car park in the East South of the layout for serving the citizens' entertainment.
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IELTS academic the map below shows the development of a particular area between 1965 and the present day

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
235 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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