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The line graph shows the average price of tickets sold at a theatre and the bar chart shows the average percentage of tickets sold in 2010 and 2011

The line graph shows the average price of tickets sold at a theatre and the bar chart shows the average percentage of tickets sold in 2010 and 2011 5P9n
The information about the average price of tickets and percentage of tickets sold at theatre is depicted by linear chart and bar chart respectively At a fleeting glance, In line chart of 2010 it can be noticed that the price of the tickets in first quarter was near about of 95 pounds. Observing further, A sharp incline can be noticed in the amount of the ticket in third quarter and it was 10. 5 pounds. Additionally, In 2011 the line graph represents the slightly decline in third quarter the price of the tickets inclinedMoving further, The percentage of tickets sold in 2010 in the first and second quarter was similar 60% but in the third quarter it gradually decreased near about 50% whereas in the fourth quarter a sharp incline can be noticed of 80%. Moreover, In 2011 the first and second quarter was similar 20% but the third quarter it rose near about 40%. Observing further, In the fourth quarter gradually increased of 80% Overall, the percentage and the price of tickets in fourth quarter was highest as compared to other quarter
The information about the average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
and percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
sold at
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
is depicted
by linear chart and bar chart
respectively
At a fleeting glance, In line chart of 2010 it can
be noticed
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
in
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quarter
was near about of
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
95 pounds
. Observing
further
, A sharp incline can
be noticed
in the amount of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ticket
in third
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quarter
and it was 10.
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
5 pounds
.
Additionally
, In 2011 the line graph represents the
slightly
decline in third
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quarter
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
Possible spelling mistake found.
inclinedMoving
further
, The percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
sold in 2010 in the
first
and second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quarter
was similar 60%
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in the third
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quarter
it
gradually
decreased near about 50% whereas in the fourth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quarter
a sharp incline can
be noticed
of 80%.
Moreover
, In 2011 the
first
and second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quarter
was similar 20%
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the third
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quarter
it rose near about 40%. Observing
further
, In the fourth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quarter
gradually
increased of 80%
Overall
, the percentage and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tickets
in fourth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quarter
was highest as compared to other
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
quarter
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IELTS academic The line graph shows the average price of tickets sold at a theatre and the bar chart shows the average percentage of tickets sold in 2010 and 2011

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
182 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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