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The line graph shows about 1 million of dollars spend on three nations Colombia Japan and Myanmar for clothing export in five years

The line graph shows about 1 million of dollars spend on three nations Colombia Japan and Myanmar for clothing export in five years xmrrb
The assigned line graph states the information about how many millions of dollars but spent by different three nations namely Colombia, Japan and Myanmar for clothing exports during the period of five years. The data has been calibrated into millions of dollars. Overall it, it is lucid that majority of clothes exported from Myanmar till middle year whilst The exportation of clothes in Colombia and Japan was increased slightly as compared to the former years. At a fleeting glance, in 1990 and 2010 Myanmar exported $800 million on clothing. However after following the next two years, reached at peak point that was a near about $900 million. Henceforth, from 2011 to 2012 the rate of dollars was went down suddenly but in the case of the next later year it again inclined marginally as well as observed that nearly $450 millions. Scrutinising further, Colombia and Japan was spent approximately $450 millions and $595 millions for clothing exports in the year 1990 respectively. After that in 2000, it considers almost identical in the favour of exporting clothes in both countries. In last two years, the dollars on clothing exports was remained a decline.
The assigned line graph states the information about how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
spent by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
three nations
namely
Colombia, Japan and Myanmar for clothing exports during the period of five years. The data has
been calibrated
into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
.
Overall
it, it is lucid that majority of clothes exported from Myanmar till middle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
whilst The exportation of clothes in Colombia and Japan
was increased
slightly
as compared to the former years. At a fleeting glance, in 1990 and 2010 Myanmar exported $800
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
on clothing.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
after following the
next
two years, reached at peak point that was a near about $900
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
. Henceforth, from 2011 to 2012 the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
was
Consider using a past participle here: "gone".
went
down
suddenly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in the case of the
next
later
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
it again inclined
marginally
as well
as observed that
nearly
$450
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
.
Possible spelling mistake. 'Scrutinising' is British English.
Scrutinising
further
, Colombia and Japan
was spent
approximately $450
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
and $595
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
for clothing exports in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1990
respectively
. After that in 2000, it considers almost identical in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of exporting clothes in both countries. In last two years, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
on clothing exports
was remained
a decline.
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IELTS academic The line graph shows about 1 million of dollars spend on three nations Colombia Japan and Myanmar for clothing export in five years

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
192 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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