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The line graph shows a rise in homeless persons across England from 2010 to 2016.

The line graph shows a rise in homeless persons across England from 2010 to 2016. pRoGy
The line graph illustrates changes in unhoused people in the United Kingdom between 2010 and 2016. Overall, it is noticeable that England was by far the most popular in the three types of regions for the majority of 6 – years period. However, a considerable rise can be seen in London and the rest of England. From 2010 to 2013, the number of homeless people in England stood at 1600 and rose slightly after three years. During same the period, unhoused people in the rest of England dropped under 1500 and fluctuated around 1900 in the year 2013. There were no significant changes in the trends for homeless people in London. By 2016, the homeless rate in England hit the highest point of 4400 people. Following England, there was a significant increase of 3100 in the number of unhoused people in the rest of England. Otherwise, a slight rise of 1000 was seen in the number of homeless people in London.
The line graph illustrates
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in
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unhoused
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people
in the United Kingdom between 2010 and 2016.

Overall
, it is noticeable that England was by far the most popular in the three types of regions for the majority of 6
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
years period.
However
, a considerable rise can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in London and the rest of England.

From 2010 to 2013, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homeless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in England stood at 1600 and rose
slightly
after three years. During same the period,
Possible spelling mistake found.
unhoused
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people
in the rest of England dropped under 1500 and fluctuated around 1900 in the year 2013. There were no significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the trends for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homeless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in London.

By 2016, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homeless
rate in England hit the highest point of 4400
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Following England, there was a significant increase of 3100 in the number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
unhoused
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the rest of England.
Otherwise
, a slight rise of 1000 was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homeless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in London.
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IELTS academic The line graph shows a rise in homeless persons across England from 2010 to 2016.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
161 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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