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The line graph illustrates the proportion of people who used the Internet in 3 distinct nations between 1999 and 2000.

The line graph illustrates the proportion of people who used the Internet in 3 distinct nations between 1999 and 2000. xD11N
The line graph illustrates the proportion of people who used the Internet in 3 distinct nations between 1999 and 2000. It can be seen that there were upward trends in the number of Internet users in America, Canada, and Mexico. Despite a significant rise in the Internet using citizens, Mexican remained the lowest figure in the period shown. To begin, in 1999, the number of people using the Internet in the USA was by far the highest rate, at about 30%, which was 20% higher than that of Mexico and almost double that figure in Canada. In 2009, the proportion of Internet usages in Canada overtook that of America, at mostly 100% for the figure of Canada and 80% for the data of the USA. Even though experiencing a dramatic increase in the number of population had to access to the Internet over the 10 years, the figure for Mexico was lowest, at about 40%.
The line graph illustrates the proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
the Internet in 3 distinct nations between 1999 and 2000.

It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that there were upward trends in the number of Internet users in America, Canada, and Mexico. Despite a significant rise
The usual collocation for technology is "on," not "in." It is better to say this: "on the Internet".
in the Internet
using citizens, Mexican remained the lowest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
in the period shown.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, in 1999, the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
using the Internet in the USA was by far the highest rate, at about 30%, which was 20% higher than that of Mexico and almost double that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
in Canada.

In 2009, the proportion of Internet usages in Canada overtook that of America, at
mostly
100% for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
of Canada and 80% for the data of the USA.
Even though
experiencing a dramatic increase in the number of population had to access to the Internet over the 10 years, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
for Mexico was lowest, at about 40%.
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IELTS academic The line graph illustrates the proportion of people who used the Internet in 3 distinct nations between 1999 and 2000.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
155 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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