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The line graph illustrates the gold sale Dubai

The line graph illustrates the gold sale Dubai lL7eD
The line graph illustrates the gold sale Dubai fluctuated over the period of 12 months in 2002. It was clear that, the gold revenue in Dubai remained relatively unchanged during the time showed. Additionally, sales were at their highest in March while the weakest can be observed in July and September. For the first month of the year, the gold sales stood at 200 million dirhams and rose slightly to reach nearly 225 million dirhams in February. This was followed by another increase, although steeper, in March when the sale figures were almost about 125 million dirhams higher than February. However, this upward trend was suddenly broken and plummeted over the next 4 months to hit the bottom at a little over 100 million dirhams in July. August sales experienced a significant rise back to the same level in January as figures nearly double, but it was not last as in Septemberwwhen they dropped again to the level that they were in July. October sales witnessed a minimal growth of 100 million dirhams, after which the sale figures levelled off and maintain relatively static over the last two months of 2002.
The line graph illustrates the gold
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sale
Dubai fluctuated
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over
the period of 12
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months
in 2002.

It was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that, the gold revenue in Dubai remained
relatively
unchanged during the time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
.
Additionally
,
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sales
were at their highest in March while the weakest can
be observed
in July and September.

For the
first
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month
of the year, the gold
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
stood at 200
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million
Possible spelling mistake found.
dirhams
and rose
slightly
to reach
nearly
225
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million
Possible spelling mistake found.
dirhams
in February. This
was followed
by another increase, although steeper, in March when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
figures were almost about 125
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
Possible spelling mistake found.
dirhams
higher than February.
However
, this upward trend was
suddenly
broken and plummeted
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over
the
next
4
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months
to hit the bottom at a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
Possible spelling mistake found.
dirhams
in July.

August
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sales
experienced a significant rise back to the same level in January as figures
nearly
double,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it was not last as in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Septemberwwhen
they dropped again to the level that they were in July. October
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sales
witnessed a minimal growth of 100
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million
Possible spelling mistake found.
dirhams
, after which the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
figures levelled off and maintain
relatively
static
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
the last two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
months
of 2002.
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IELTS academic The line graph illustrates the gold sale Dubai

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
191 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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