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The line graph illustrates how the demographic structure of New Zealand changes between 1950 and 2050.

The line graph illustrates how the demographic structure of New Zealand changes between 1950 and 2050. PdjJ
The line graph illustrates how the demographic structure of New Zealand changes between 1950 and 2050. Overall, while the ratio of people aged 0-14 and 38-45 witnessed an upward trend, a reverse pattern can be seen in the counterpart of people aged 25-37 and over 65. Additionally, the group of people over 65 years old is always the most prominent age bracket during the researched timescale. In 1950, the proportion of people from 38 to 45 years old accounted for 25%, which was five times as much as that of 0-14-year-old people. Over the following 4 decades, the former experienced a significant increase to merely a half, whereas the latter had a slight dip to approximately 4%. Predictably, by 2050, the 38-45 age group is envisaged to hit the plateau at 40%, while the data of those from 0-14 may undergo rapid growth to 20%. In contrast, in the 1950 year, over 60% of New Zealand’s population were aged 65 and over, which was far exceeding that of people aged 25-37 with 20%. After that, both the two age brackets experienced a period of fluctuation, before being forecasted
The line graph illustrates how the demographic structure of New Zealand
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
between 1950 and 2050.

Overall
, while the ratio of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aged
0-14 and 38-45 witnessed an upward trend, a reverse pattern can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the counterpart of
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aged
25-37 and
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over
65.
Additionally
, the group of
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
65 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
is always the most prominent age bracket during the researched timescale.

In 1950, the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from 38 to 45 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
accounted for 25%, which was five times as much as that of 0-14-year-
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Over
the following 4 decades, the former experienced a significant increase to
merely
a half, whereas the latter had a slight dip to approximately 4%.
Predictably
, by 2050, the 38-45 age group
is envisaged
to hit the plateau at 40%, while the data of those from 0-14 may undergo rapid growth to 20%.

In contrast
, in the 1950 year,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
60% of New Zealand’s population were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aged
65 and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
, which was far exceeding that of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aged
25-37 with 20%. After that, both the two age brackets experienced a period of fluctuation,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
being
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
forecasted
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IELTS academic The line graph illustrates how the demographic structure of New Zealand changes between 1950 and 2050.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
187 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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