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The line graph gives information about different type of food such as pizza chips and humburgers consumed by teenagers between 1975 and 2000. It is depicted by redarded line graph. The data has calibrated in the percentage.

The line graph gives information about different type of food such as pizza chips and humburgers consumed by teenagers between 1975 and 2000. It is depicted by redarded line graph. The data has calibrated in the percentage. 5bB5m
To begin with, in 1975 percentage of fish and chips 100 percent consumed by Australia masse then in the next it was slightly decrease which was 79 percent. However, in the followed year it was slightly rise up then, there was continuously decline at the end of period which was nearly 40percent. Furthermore, in the begining time 10 percent teenagers interested in buy humburgers whereas 5% offsprings were buy pizza in 1975 and in the next year's it was sharply rise up approximately 22%. Moreover after five year rapidly increase seen in consumption of pizza and humburgers above 60%. And eventually pizza and humburgers were perchase by individuals 80to100%respectively. To sum up, it can be vividly manifested that the majority of people give preference to eat fish and chip while, pizza and humburgers were not liked by teenagers.
To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, in 1975 percentage of fish and chips 100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
consumed by Australia
Possible spelling mistake found.
masse
then in the
next
it was
slightly
Consider using a past participle here: "decreased".
decrease
which was 79
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
.
However
, in the followed year it was
slightly
Consider using a past participle here: "risen".
rise
up then, there was
continuously
decline at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of period which was
nearly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
40percent
.
Furthermore
, in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
begining
time 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
interested in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
Possible spelling mistake found.
humburgers
whereas 5%
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "offspring", the plural form of the noun 'offspring'?
offsprings
were
Consider using a past participle here: "bought".
buy
pizza in 1975 and in the
next
year's it was
sharply
Consider using a past participle here: "risen".
rise
up approximately 22%.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
after five year
rapidly
increase
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in consumption of pizza and
Possible spelling mistake found.
humburgers
above 60%. And
eventually
pizza and
Possible spelling mistake found.
humburgers
were
Possible spelling mistake found.
perchase
by individuals 80to100%
respectively
. To sum up, it can be
vividly
manifested that the majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
give preference to eat fish and chip while, pizza and
Possible spelling mistake found.
humburgers
were not liked by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
.
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IELTS academic The line graph gives information about different type of food such as pizza chips and humburgers consumed by teenagers between 1975 and 2000. It is depicted by redarded line graph. The data has calibrated in the percentage.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
138 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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