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The chart provide the results of a survey conducted on 100 people(50 for men and 50 for women)about their favourite kind of movie

The chart provide the results of a survey conducted on 100 people(50 for men and 50 for women)about their favourite kind of movie l7XLK
The bar graph illustrates the study held on 100 individuals equally consisting both the genders regarding their preference to action, comedy, romance, animated or thriller movies. Overall, it can be clearly seen that action movies are highly popular among the men, whereas women choose comedy, romance and thriller films at equal rates. To begin with, action pictures are most famous among the men with the percentage of 20, while females opt these with the lowest percentile of 4. Furthermore, the demand for comedy is higher among the women accounted as 12%, however the popularity of these reduced by 4% for the men. Probing further, the data collected represents that the proportion for romance and thriller movies are identical recorded as one in twenty (5%) for men and nearly one in ten (10%) for women, moreover animated scenes are more admired by men with 12 per cent, whilst the ratio dip down by 2% for women
The bar graph illustrates the study held on 100 individuals
equally
consisting both the genders regarding their preference to action, comedy, romance, animated or thriller movies.
Overall
, it can be
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that action movies are
highly
popular among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
, whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
choose comedy, romance and thriller films at equal rates. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, action pictures are most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
with the percentage of 20, while females opt these with the lowest percentile of 4.
Furthermore
, the demand for comedy is higher among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
accounted as 12%,
however
the popularity of these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
by 4% for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
. Probing
further
, the data collected represents that the proportion for romance and thriller movies are identical recorded as one in twenty (5%) for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
nearly
one in ten (10%) for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
,
moreover
animated scenes are more admired by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
with 12 per cent, whilst the ratio dip down by 2% for
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
women
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IELTS academic The chart provide the results of a survey conducted on 100 people(50 for men and 50 for women)about their favourite kind of movie

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
154 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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