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The graphs give information about the number of hours people spent on social media every day between 2010 and 2016 and also provide the reasons why they used them.

The graphs give information about the number of hours people spent on social media every day between 2010 and 2016 and also provide the reasons why they used them. 851Yr
The graphs give information about the number of hours people spent on social media every day between 2010 and 2016 and also provide the reasons why they used them. Overall, it is clear that Snapchat was the most popular site over the period and remained high throughout. It was closely followed by facebook, which declined gradually in 2016. Instagram's popularity varied considerably from year to year, staring low, but eventually exceeding facebook in popularity. LinkedIn was less popular overall, but increased moderately over the period. In 2010, people spent more than 4 hours on daily basis on facebook which is double than Instagram. It rose slightly till the year 2014 for 5 hours but dropped significantly in 2016 to 4 hours. Instagram had variety of figures over the period, in 2010, people spent just over 2 hours and this rose sharply in 2012 and again dipped down in 2014. At last it reached 4 and half hour of usage. In term of snapchat, which spent highest number of hours between 2010 and 2016 and the figures fluctuated by an hour. It started from 5 hours and ends with 6 hours in 2016. In contrast, people spent the fewest hours on LinkedIn, which accounts for half an hour but its usage got increased gradually year by year provided that, in 2014, users spent almost 2 hours and fell again after 2 years. Interestingly, people used social media for communication most and least for videos, considering 58% and 9% respectively. 10% and 23% people using applications for play games and shopping individually.
The graphs give information about the number of
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hours
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
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spent
on social media every day between 2010 and 2016 and
also
provide the reasons why they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
them.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that Snapchat was the most popular site
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over
the period and remained high throughout. It was
closely
followed by
Possible spelling mistake found.
facebook
, which declined
gradually
in 2016. Instagram's popularity varied
considerably
from
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year
to
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year
, staring low,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
eventually
exceeding
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facebook
in popularity. LinkedIn was less popular
overall
,
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but
increased
moderately
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over
the period.

In 2010,
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people
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spent
more than 4
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hours
on daily basis on
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facebook
which is double than Instagram. It rose
slightly
till the
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year
2014 for 5
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hours
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
dropped
significantly
in 2016 to 4
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hours
. Instagram had variety of figures
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over
the period, in 2010,
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people
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spent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
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over
2
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hours
and this rose
sharply
in 2012 and again dipped down in 2014. At
The comma is probably missing here: "last, it".
last it
reached 4 and half
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hour
of usage.

In term of
Possible spelling mistake found.
snapchat
, which
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spent
A determiner is probably missing here: "the highest".
highest
number of
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hours
between 2010 and 2016 and the figures fluctuated by an
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hour
. It
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started
from 5
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hours
and ends with 6
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hours
in 2016.
In contrast
,
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people
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spent
the fewest
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hours
on LinkedIn, which accounts for half an
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hour
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
its usage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
increased
gradually
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year
by
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year
provided that, in 2014, users
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spent
almost 2
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hours
and fell again after 2 years.

Interestingly
,
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
social media for communication most and least for videos, considering 58% and 9%
respectively
. 10% and 23%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
using applications for play games and shopping
individually
.
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IELTS academic The graphs give information about the number of hours people spent on social media every day between 2010 and 2016 and also provide the reasons why they used them.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
260 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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