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The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words. Writing task 1

The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. g5yea
The Given graph gives information about the number of new and returning students in an Australian university by both local and foreign students. Overall, it could be seen that the total number of students both local and overseas scholars continued to rise even though the local scholars figure maintained a particular population for about four years. The newly enrolled scholars on the oversea section continued to experience a rapid growth while the local students population followed an unsteady trend towards the end of the period. The total number of returning students recorded by the overseas pupils started at a figure about 2000 in 2001 and continued to grow with a sharp rise noticed although the period and ended with above 8000 students in 2010. Moreover, the total growth of local student who were formerly enrolled was 400, 000 and a rapid rise noticed till 2007 where about 600, 000 students were noticed to be In school after which it remained at the same figure till the end of the given period. (2010)Incidentally the number of freshmen in the overseas category started at a figure below 2000 scholars and increased by double in 2009 where the speed reduced and at the end of the period, closed with a figure slightly higher than 4000 in 2010. The local freshmen recorded below 200, 000 in 2002 and was noticed to have follow an unsteady strand with a slight increase in 2008 to little above 200, 000 with a minute decline noticed till the end of the period.
The
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Given
graph gives information about the
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number
of new and returning
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students
in an Australian university by both
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local
and foreign
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students
.
Overall
, it could be
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seen
that the total
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number
of
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students
both
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local
and
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overseas
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scholars
continued to rise
even though
the
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local
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scholars
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figure
maintained a particular population for about four years. The
newly
enrolled
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scholars
on the oversea section continued to experience a rapid growth while the
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local
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "students'" or "student's"?
students
population followed an unsteady trend towards the
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end
of the
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period
. The total
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number
of returning
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students
recorded by the
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overseas
pupils
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
at a
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figure
about 2000 in 2001 and continued to grow with a sharp rise
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noticed
although the
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period
and ended with above 8000
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students
in 2010.
Moreover
, the total growth of
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local
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student
who were
formerly
enrolled was 400, 000 and a rapid rise
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noticed
till 2007 where about 600, 000
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students
were
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noticed
to be In school after which it remained at the same
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figure
till the
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end
of the
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given
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period
. (2010)
Incidentally
the
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number
of freshmen in the
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overseas
category
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started
at a
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figure
below 2000
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scholars
and increased by double in 2009 where the speed
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reduced
and at the
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end
of the
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period
, closed with a
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figure
slightly
higher than 4000 in 2010. The
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local
freshmen recorded below 200, 000 in 2002 and was
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noticed
to have
Use past participle here: "followed".
follow
an unsteady strand with a slight increase in 2008 to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
above 200, 000 with a minute decline
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noticed
till the
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end
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
.
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IELTS academic The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
254 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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