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The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period.

The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. RP88
The two given graphs compare the enrolments between foreign students and Australian students in Australian universities during 2001 and 2010. The number of foreign pupils enrolments who are commencing studying in Australia was increasing gradually, from approximately 10000 people to 40000 people, between 2001 and 2009, then it remained constant in 2010. It grew four-time in the total number of overseas college students who study in Australia between 2001 to 2010. In contrast, the number of local pupils in universities in Australia fluctuated over a ten-year period with a steadily downward trend. This reflected the total number of local college students, which increased slightly until flatten off in 2007 to 2010. To sum up, the foreigners, who study in Australian college show a result of an upward trend overtime period, while local college students tend to study in their county lower.
The two
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
graphs compare the
Possible spelling mistake. 'enrolments' is British English.
enrolments
between foreign
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students
and Australian
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students
in Australian universities during 2001 and 2010.

The
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number
of foreign pupils
Possible spelling mistake. 'enrolments' is British English.
enrolments
who are commencing studying in Australia was increasing
gradually
, from approximately 10000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to 40000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, between 2001 and 2009, then it remained constant in 2010. It grew four-time in the total
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number
of overseas college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who study in Australia
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 2001 and 2010".
between 2001 to 2010
.

In contrast
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of local pupils in universities in Australia fluctuated over a ten-year period with a
steadily
downward trend. This reflected the total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of local college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, which increased
slightly
until flatten off in 2007 to 2010.

To sum up, the foreigners, who study in Australian college
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
a result of an upward trend overtime period, while local college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
tend to study in their county lower.
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IELTS academic The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
141 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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