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The graph shows the impact of vaccinations on the incidence of whooping cough, a childhood illness, between 1940 and 1990 in britain. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The charts shows the influence of vaccinations in the cases of whooping cough in England, from 1940 to 1990. Overview, we can see that the number of cases of whooping cough decrease significantly over the pass of the years due to the start of the vaccinations. Reaching its lower point in 2010, when the number of infected children was near cero. The reported cases reached its maximus in1940, when the number of cases was approximately 180. 000. Therefore, the number of infected children presented abrupt variations, but the cases never went of below 60000. Nevertheless, around 1955 the vaccination process began, and the number of sick children started to decrease constanly over the years, until 1975 when the number of new cases increase up to 80. 000. Therefore, around 1980, the reported cases started to diminish steadily until 2010, when it reached its lower point of near cero cases.
The charts
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the influence of vaccinations in the cases of whooping cough in England, from 1940 to 1990. Overview, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of cases of whooping cough decrease
significantly
over the pass of the years due to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of the vaccinations. Reaching its lower point in 2010, when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of infected children was near cero.

The reported cases reached its maximus in1940, when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of cases was approximately 180. 000.
Therefore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of infected children presented abrupt variations,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the cases never went of below 60000.
Nevertheless
, around 1955 the vaccination process began, and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of sick children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to decrease
constanly
over the years, until 1975 when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of new cases increase up to 80. 000.
Therefore
, around 1980, the reported cases
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to diminish
steadily
until 2010, when it reached its lower point of near cero cases.

IELTS academic The graph shows the impact of vaccinations on the incidence of whooping cough, a childhood illness, between 1940 and 1990 in britain.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
149 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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Lexical Resource: 6.0
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Grammatical Range: 6.0
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Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
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  • The graph shows the impact of vaccinations on the incidence of whooping cough, a childhood illness, between 1940 and 1990 in britain. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.