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The graph shows the estimated oil capacity in millions of barrels per day from 1990 to 2010.

The graph shows the estimated oil capacity in millions of barrels per day from 1990 to 2010. GMKrw
The given graph compares the activities are done by the elderly people in their free times. There are five activities namely reading, hiking, going to theatre, watching TV and surfing the internet over the given four decades ranging from 1980s to 2010s. The units are measured by percentage. Overall, the significant activity is hiking; second least popular in early decade nonetheless in the modern decade, it is very popular and reach the peak. In contrast, watching TV is the most popular in 1980s however it is gradually decrease in the final decade of given period. According to the graph, elderly people spent most their leisure time by watching TV in 1980 and it increased to 70% in 2000s. Afterwards, it slightly declined to just over 60% in 2001s. Going to the theatre was similar to the watching TV. It was the second most popular activity among the older people nevertheless there was a dramatical drop to 30% in 1990s and it progressively rose until reached the final decade. Hiking was the noticeable activity; only 20% elderly people do this nevertheless this activity significantly jump until reached the apex of 80% over the given period. In 1980s, the proportion of people relaxed their free time with reading was 30% and it fluctuated from 1980s to 2000s. After that it tripled by 40% from 20% to 60%. The older people didn’t use internet wildly however it gradually increased and there was a sharply move upward in the percentage of 50% in the final decade.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
graph compares the
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activities
are done
by the elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in their free times. There are five
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activities
namely
reading, hiking, going to
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
, watching TV and surfing the internet over the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
four decades ranging from 1980s to 2010s. The units
are measured
by percentage.
Overall
, the significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
is hiking; second least
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
in early decade nonetheless in the modern decade, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
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popular
and reach the peak.
In contrast
, watching TV is the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
The article is probably missing here: "in the 1980s".
in 1980s
however
it is
gradually
Consider using a past participle here: "decreased".
decrease
in the final decade of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period.

According to the graph, elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spent most their leisure time by watching TV in 1980 and it increased to 70%
The article is probably missing here: "in the 2000s".
in 2000s
. Afterwards, it
slightly
declined to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 60% in 2001s. Going to the
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
was similar to the watching TV. It was the second most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
among the older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
nevertheless
there was a
Possible spelling mistake found.
dramatical
drop to 30%
The article is probably missing here: "in the 1990s".
in 1990s
and it
progressively
rose until reached the final decade.

Hiking was the noticeable
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activity
;
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
20% elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do this
nevertheless
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
significantly
jump until reached the apex of 80% over the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period.
The article is probably missing here: "In the 1980s".
In 1980s
, the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
relaxed their free time with reading was 30% and it fluctuated from 1980s to 2000s.
“After” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
After
that it tripled by 40% from 20% to 60%. The older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
didn’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
internet
wildly
however
it
gradually
increased and there was a
sharply
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
upward in the percentage of 50% in the final decade.
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IELTS academic The graph shows the estimated oil capacity in millions of barrels per day from 1990 to 2010.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
252 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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