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The graph shows the average annual expenditure on cell phone and residential phone services

The graph shows the average annual expenditure on cell phone and residential phone services 9x2x
The line graph compares average yearly spending by Americans on mobile and landline phone services from 2001 to 2010. It is clear that spending on landline phones fell steadily over the 10-year period, while mobile phone expenditure rose quickly. The year 2006 marks the point at which expenditure on mobile services overtook that for residential phone services. In 2001, US consumers spent an average of nearly $700 on residential phone services, compared to only around $200 on cell phone services. Over the following five years, average yearly spending on landlines dropped by nearly $200. By contrast, expenditure on mobiles rose by approximately $300. In the year 2006, the average American paid out the same amount of money on both types of phone service, spending just over $500 on each. By 2010, expenditure on mobile phones had reached around $750, while the figure for spending on residential services had fallen to just over half this amount.
The line graph compares
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average
yearly
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spending
by Americans on mobile and

landline
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phone
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services
from 2001 to 2010.

It is
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clear
that
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spending
on landline
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phones
fell
steadily
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over
the
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10-year
period, while

mobile
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phone
expenditure rose
quickly
. The
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year
2006 marks the point at which

expenditure on mobile
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services
overtook that for residential
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phone
services.

In 2001, US consumers spent an
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average
of
nearly
$700 on residential phone

services, compared to
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only
around $200 on cell
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phone
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services
.
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Over
the following

five years,
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average
yearly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
on landlines dropped by
nearly
$200. By contrast,

expenditure on mobiles rose by approximately $300.

In the
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year
2006, the
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average
American paid out the same amount of money on both

types of
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phone
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service
,
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spending
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
$500 on each. By 2010, expenditure on

mobile
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phones
had reached around $750, while the figure for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
on residential

services had fallen to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
half this amount.

IELTS academic The graph shows the average annual expenditure on cell phone and residential phone services

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
155 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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