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The graph shows changes in the sales of musical instruments in the UK from 2008 to the present and gives predictions for future sales. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph illustrates that musical instrument sale in the UK. In Pianos, 2008-2009 is the highest percentage of total sales. And then, it gradually down fewer than 5%. From 2010 to 2019, we cannot see the strange changes during this period but at the start of 2019, it increased nearly around 5%. Another trumpets line states that it gradually decreased from over 10% to nearly 0% in 2014-2015 period. After that, it again up to over 5% until 2021. Drum and percussion sales took same place with trumpets sale at the start of 2008-2009. But it is different with trumpets because it slightly increased around 15% until 2015. And then little decreased to 10% and became stable. We can see that many changes in guitar line. At the start of 2008, the sales of guitars stand up over 15% but next year it became down nearly 10%. The sale of guitar became popular in 2016-2017 because it reached to nearly 24%. Then it gradually decreased about 9% in 2021. The four line states that musical instruments sales in the UK are not stable and always change all time depend on people desires.
The graph illustrates that musical instrument
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
in the UK. In Pianos, 2008-2009 is the highest percentage of total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
. And then, it
gradually
down fewer than 5%. From 2010 to 2019, we cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the strange
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
during this period
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of 2019, it increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nearly
around 5%.

Another trumpets line states that it
gradually
decreased from over 10% to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nearly
0% in 2014-2015 period. After that, it again up to over 5% until 2021. Drum and percussion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
took same place with trumpets
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of 2008-2009.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
with trumpets
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
slightly
increased around 15% until 2015. And then
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
decreased to 10% and became stable.

We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in guitar line. At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of 2008, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of guitars stand up over 15%
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
next
year it became down
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nearly
10%. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
of guitar became popular in 2016-2017
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it reached to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nearly
24%. Then it
gradually
decreased about 9% in 2021.

The four line states that musical instruments
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
in the UK are not stable and always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
all time depend on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If ‘people’ is plural here, don’t use the third-person singular verb.
desires
.
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IELTS academic The graph shows changes in the sales of musical instruments in the UK from 2008 to the present and gives predictions for future sales.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
192 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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