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The graph illustrates the volume of telephone calls made in the united kingdom, presented in three groups, over a span of 8 years from 1995 to 2002. Overall, it can be seen that fixed lines were the most popular way for telecommunication over the given period in the united kingdom. However, mobile phones were Less popular . its popularity increased sharply over the same period.

To begin with, the period from 1995 to 1999 witnessed a rapid increase in the number of national calls made through fixed lines from 72 to 90 billion minutes in 1998. Then this figure remained stable till 1999. Afterwards, it went down to reach 70 at the end of the given period. On the equal ground, the call volume of national and international calls went up from 30 to 50 billion minutes in 2002. This figure was nearly half of this of local calls over the entire period, but it did not fall. Similarly, the number of calls made through mobile phones followed the same upward trend from less 5 to almost 40 billion minutes in 2002.
To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the period from 1995 to 1999 witnessed a rapid increase in the number of national
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calls
made through
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
lines from 72 to 90 billion minutes in 1998. Then this figure remained stable till 1999. Afterwards, it went down to reach 70 at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period.

On the equal ground, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
call
volume of national and international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
went up from 30 to 50 billion minutes in 2002. This figure was
nearly
half of this of local
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calls
over the entire period,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it did not fall.
Similarly
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
made through mobile phones followed the same upward trend from less 5 to almost 40 billion minutes in 2002.

IELTS academic The graph illustrates the volume of telephone calls made in the united kingdom, presented in three groups, over a span of 8 years from 1995 to 2002. Overall, it can be seen that fixed lines were the most popular way for telecommunication over the given period in the united kingdom. However, mobile phones were Less popular. its popularity increased sharply over the same period.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
117 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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Lexical Resource: 6.0
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Grammatical Range: 6.0
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • The graph illustrates the volume of telephone calls made in the united kingdom, presented in three groups, over a span of 8 years from 1995 to 2002. Overall, it can be seen that fixed lines were the most popular way for telecommunication over the given period in the united kingdom. However, mobile phones were Less popular . its popularity increased sharply over the same period.