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The graph illustrates the number of books borrowed from four village libraries from June to September in 2010

The graph illustrates the number of books borrowed from four village libraries from June to September in 2010 aE5QX
The line graph shows how many books were borrowed from four village libraries over a period of four months between June and September in 2010. Overall, it can clearly be seen that the library with the greater number of borrowed book at the start decreased whereas the other three libraries with lower figure increased throughout the given period, with the exception of the Sutton Wood which decreased during August. Moreover, while the number of books borrowed from Ryesip was greater at the start, it had been overtaken by Sutton Wood by the end of the period. In terms of library with the greatest figure at the start, Ryesip lend at exactly 300 books in June. In the following months, it witnessed a gradual drop by approximately 120 in the final month. In contrast, the figure for Sutton Wood rose slightly to around 275 in July before hitting a trough at precisely 100 in August. From this point onwards, not only it skyrocketed and peaked at 300 at the end, it also surpassed the figures for the other libraries. Regarding the other two libraries with low figures at the beginning, the number of books borrow from West Eaton and Church Mount started far lower than Sutton Wood both at precisely 50. Then, they grew gradually and converged at exactly 150, which were three-fold from their initial value at the end of observation.
The line graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
how
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many
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books
were borrowed
from four village libraries over a period of four months between June and September in 2010.

Overall
, it can
clearly
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the library with the greater number of borrowed
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book
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
decreased whereas the other three libraries with lower
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figure
increased throughout the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period,
Consider using "except" or "except for"
with the exception of
the Sutton
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Wood
which decreased during August.
Moreover
, while the number of
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books
borrowed from
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Ryesip
was greater at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
, it had
been overtaken
by Sutton
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Wood
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period.

In terms of library with the greatest
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figure
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ryesip
lend at exactly 300
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books
in June. In the following months, it witnessed a gradual drop by approximately 120 in the final month.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
contrast, the
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figure
for Sutton
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Wood
rose
slightly
to around 275 in July
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
hitting a trough at
precisely
100 in August. From this point onwards, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
it skyrocketed and peaked at 300 at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, it
also
surpassed the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
for the other libraries.

Regarding the other two libraries with low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
at the beginning, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
borrow from West Eaton and Church Mount
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
far lower than Sutton
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Wood
both at
precisely
50. Then, they grew
gradually
and converged at exactly 150, which were three-fold from their initial value at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of observation.
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IELTS academic The graph illustrates the number of books borrowed from four village libraries from June to September in 2010

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
231 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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