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The graph gives the information about the percentage of employers in various sectors in one country who have difficulty in finding workers in 2003 and 2004

The graph gives the information about the percentage of employers in various sectors in one country who have difficulty in finding workers in 2003 and 2004 xxKKw
The table illustrates the figure of employers in various sectors in one country who have difficulty in finding workers from 2003 to 2004. Overall, it is clear that enrolling technical and managerial staff for work was easier than finding both skilled and unskilled staffs in both years. In 2003, in the manufacturing, building, commerce and services sectors, almost equal percentage (41% - 54%) found difficulty in hiring skilled workers. Between 20 and 27% of employers found it hard to find unskilled labor in 2003. This percentage increased slightly in all sectors except for the commerce and the building sector, in which it decreased in 2004. The percentage increased in all sectors except the commerce and the building sector, where it fell to 19% and 24%. The technical and managerial stall was the least difficult to find. In the construction sector the percentage of employers who found it tough to find staff was 14%, but it decreased by 4% in 2004. In the manufacturing, services and commerce sectors, the percentage fell from 5% and 2% in 2003 to 2% and 0% by 2004, respectively.
The table illustrates the figure of employers in various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
in one country who have difficulty in finding workers from 2003 to 2004.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that enrolling technical and managerial staff for work was easier than finding both skilled and unskilled staffs in both years.

In 2003, in the manufacturing, building,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commerce
and services
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
, almost equal
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percentage
(41%
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
54%) found difficulty in hiring skilled workers. Between 20 and 27% of employers found it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to find unskilled labor in 2003. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
increased
slightly
in all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
except for
the
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commerce
and the building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
, in which it decreased in 2004. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
increased in all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
except the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commerce
and the building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
, where it fell to 19% and 24%.

The technical and managerial stall was the least difficult to find. In the construction
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of employers who found it tough to find staff was 14%,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it decreased by 4% in 2004. In the manufacturing, services and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commerce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
fell from 5% and 2% in 2003 to 2% and 0% by 2004,
respectively
.
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IELTS academic The graph gives the information about the percentage of employers in various sectors in one country who have difficulty in finding workers in 2003 and 2004

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
183 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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