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The graph delineates the number of residents in New Zealand over a period of 100 years.

The graph delineates the number of residents in New Zealand over a period of 100 years. KlAmM
The graph delineates the number of residents in New Zealand over a period of 100 years. As is observed, a glance at the chart reveals that there were clearly illustrates two major trends. The percentage of people who are in the age of 35-64 and 65+ has been rising gradually for over the 100-year period, while the two others have been substantially for falling. In the year 1952 to 2010, The group of people are on the 15 years old what’s the highest values which is about 31%, are those the number was significantly fluctuated. Beside it, the proportion of the grown-ups that about 15-34 years old was marginally fell to 24%. On the other hand, the 2 other groups were slightly climbed, that accounts for 19% and 11% perspectively.
The graph delineates the number of residents in New Zealand over a period of 100 years.

As
is observed
, a glance at the chart reveals that there were
clearly
illustrates two major trends. The percentage of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are in the age of 35-64 and 65+ has been rising
gradually
for over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
100-year
period, while the two others have been
substantially
for falling. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1952 to 2010, The group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are on the 15 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
what’s the highest values which is about 31%, are those the number was
significantly
fluctuated. Beside it, the proportion of the grown-ups that about 15-34 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
was
marginally
fell to 24%.
On the other hand
, the 2 other groups were
slightly
climbed, that accounts for 19% and 11%
Possible spelling mistake found.
perspectively
.
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IELTS academic The graph delineates the number of residents in New Zealand over a period of 100 years.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
130 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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