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The graph below shows the percentage of university students studying arts degrees over four different decades in three continents. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

The graph below shows the percentage of university students studying arts degrees over four different decades in three continents. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below. 0wRJ3
Given are three column graphs comparing the rates of university students who studying arts degrees in various different parts of the world over the span of 4 decades. While Asia enjoys relatively high levels of students arts grades overall, it seems that observers in America are far less likely to be gained the knowledge. In details, America which contributed a low percentage of education in 1960, put up by far the highest percentum of art literacy, peaking at 34% in 1970. But it then dropped in steady increments to a low of 25% in 1990. Asia, in stark contrast had a relatively minor rate in the arts education in 1960. This situation changed gradually at first, then its percentage contribution remained static between 1970 and 1980. But then by 1990 it matched high point peaking at 15 %. Also noteworthy is the fact that Europe contributed by far the highest percent of students studying arts degrees, culminated at 30%. However, afterwards, it dropped gradual increments to a low of 25% in 1970. Then plateaued for the next two decades.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
Consider using third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "is".
are
three column graphs comparing the rates of university students who studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
degrees in various
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parts of the world over the span of 4 decades.

While Asia enjoys
relatively
high levels of students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
grades
overall
, it seems that observers in America are far less likely to
be gained
the knowledge.

In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, America which contributed a low percentage of education in 1960, put up by far the highest
Possible spelling mistake found.
percentum
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
literacy, peaking at 34% in 1970.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it then dropped in steady increments to a low of 25% in 1990.

Asia, in stark contrast had a
relatively
minor rate in the
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "arts'" or "art's"?
arts
education in 1960. This situation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
gradually
at
first
, then its percentage contribution remained static between 1970 and 1980.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
then by 1990 it matched high point peaking at 15 %.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
noteworthy is the fact that Europe contributed by far the highest percent of students studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
degrees, culminated at 30%.
However
, afterwards, it dropped gradual increments to a low of 25% in 1970. Then plateaued for the
next
two decades.

IELTS academic The graph below shows the percentage of university students studying arts degrees over four different decades in three continents. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
179 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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