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The graph below shows the number of enquiries received by the Tourist Information Office in one city over a six-month period in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph gives information about the number of inquiries that came through three different modes in the tourist information office from January to till June 2011. Overall, it is clear that this office received more inquiries through in person and by telephone, compare to by letter/ email. In the initial month, around 900 inquiries brought by telephone. Although in February to till April there was some fluctuations, but in May it rose dramatically to 1400 calls. More and more people used telephone to get some information. 1600 people asked inquiries by telephone in the end of June 2011. Eventhough in the early month approximately only 450 people came in the tourist office to get some information, but the trend showed continuously increased. In June 2011, this mode hit the number almost four fold compare to initial month. Less than 900 inquiries received through letter/email. This trend showed degradation, and finally, in the end of period not more than 400 inquiries received through this mode.
The graph gives
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information
about the number of
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inquiries
that came
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through
three
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different
modes in the tourist
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information
office from January to till June 2011.
Overall
, it is
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clear
that this office received more
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inquiries
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through
in person and by
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telephone
, compare to by letter/ email.

In the initial month, around 900
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inquiries
brought by
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telephone
. Although in February to till April there was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fluctuations,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in May it rose
dramatically
to 1400 calls. More and more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
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telephone
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
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information
. 1600
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
asked
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inquiries
by
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telephone
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of June 2011.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Eventhough
in the early month approximately
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only
450
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
came in the tourist office to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
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information
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the trend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
continuously
increased. In June 2011, this mode hit the number almost
It seems that a hyphen is missing in the adjective or adverb “four-fold”?
four fold
Possible agreement error. The noun ‘compare’ seems to be countable, so consider using: “compares”.
compare
to initial month.

Less than 900
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inquiries
received
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through
letter/email. This trend
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showed
degradation, and
finally
, in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of period not more than 400
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
inquiries
received
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
this mode.
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IELTS academic The graph below shows the number of enquiries received by the Tourist Information Office in one city over a six-month period in 2011.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
164 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • The graph below shows the number of enquiries received by the Tourist Information Office in one city over a six-month period in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.