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The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a european country between 1979 and 2004.

The provided graph illustrates the consumption of fish and three different kinds of meats in a European country between 1979 and 2004. As a general trend, consumption of fish was lowest between 1979 and 2004 and with time people started eating less lamb and beef and preferred chicken more. It is shown that the consumption of fish remained almost steady between 1979 and 2004 with an average of 50 grammes per person per week. Fish was less consumed compared to lamb, beef and chicken meats. Consumption of beef was the highest among different kinds of meat in 1979 (above 200 grammes/ week) but people started eating more chicken over the time and in 2004 chicken was the most consumed meat with about 250 gm per person weekly consumption. People ate almost the same amount of lamb in 1979 as they ate chicken which was 150 grammes, but unlike chicken, their liking for lamb decreased and the consumption of lamb declined like beef. Overall it can be said that in 1979 people ate beef the most and fish the least, and in 2004 chicken became the most eaten meat, fish remained at the bottom with least consumption as always.
The provided graph illustrates the
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consumption
of fish and three
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different
kinds of
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meats
in a European country between 1979 and 2004. As a general trend,
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consumption
of fish was lowest between 1979 and 2004 and with time
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
eating less
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lamb
and
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beef
and preferred chicken more.

It
is shown
that the
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consumption
of fish remained almost steady between 1979 and 2004 with an average of 50
Possible spelling mistake. ‘grammes’ is British English.
grammes
per person per week. Fish was less consumed compared to
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lamb
,
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beef
and chicken
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meats
.
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Consumption
of
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beef
was the highest among
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of
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meat
in 1979 (above 200
Possible spelling mistake. ‘grammes’ is British English.
grammes
/ week)
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
eating more chicken over the time and in 2004 chicken was the most consumed
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meat
with about 250 gm
In this context, “per-person” forms an adjective and is spelled with a hyphen.
per person
weekly
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consumption
.
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People
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ate
almost the same amount of
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lamb
in 1979 as they
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ate
chicken which was 150
Possible spelling mistake. ‘grammes’ is British English.
grammes
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
unlike chicken, their liking for
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lamb
decreased and the
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consumption
of
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lamb
declined like beef.

Overall
it can
be said
that in 1979
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people
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ate
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beef
the most and fish the least, and in 2004 chicken became the most eaten
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meat
, fish remained at the bottom with
A determiner is probably missing here: “the least”.
least
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
as always.

IELTS academic The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a european country between 1979 and 2004.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
198 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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