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The graph below shows the average time spent by four car manufactures to produce vehicles at their US factories.

The graph below shows the average time spent by four car manufactures to produce vehicles at their US factories. 7J6J2
The line graph depicts how much time was consumed to manufacture vehicles in the US by four various brands( General motor, Ford, Toyota, Honda) from 1998 to 2005. Overall, it is apparently observed that there was a moderate downward trend in the amount of time spent on assembling by all brands. Apart from General Motor, the time production of the others fluctuated slightly during the period. In 1998, Gmotor accounted for the longest time to create the car, at 32 hours, compared to 28 hours of Ford. The hours per vehicle utilized by Toyota and Honda were relatively equal, at 22 hours For the rest of the period, Gmotor reduced the average time to manufacture car, just below 22 hours in 2005. By contrast, Ford increased time to nearly 32 hours to produce car then decreased to roughly 21 hours in the year 2005. In terms of Toyota and Honda, the figures fluctuated over the period and levelled off at 20 hours per vehicle.
The line graph depicts how much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
was consumed
to manufacture vehicles in the US by four various brands
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
General motor, Ford, Toyota, Honda) from 1998 to 2005.

Overall
, it is
apparently
observed that there was a moderate downward trend in the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
spent on assembling by all brands. Apart from General Motor, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
production of the others fluctuated
slightly
during the period.

In 1998,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Gmotor
accounted for the longest
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time
to create the car, at 32
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hours
, compared to 28
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
of Ford. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
per vehicle utilized by Toyota and Honda were
relatively
equal, at 22 hours

For the rest of the period,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Gmotor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
the average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to manufacture car,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
below 22
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
in 2005. By contrast, Ford increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
nearly
32
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
to produce car then decreased to roughly 21
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
in the year 2005. In terms of Toyota and Honda, the figures fluctuated over the period and levelled off at 20
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
per vehicle.

IELTS academic The graph below shows the average time spent by four car manufactures to produce vehicles at their US factories.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
164 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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