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The graph below information about Monthly temperature of major three cities.

The graph below information about Monthly temperature of major three cities. gWnpg
The give graph provide data about annually temperature of london, new york and sydney. It is observed that in the temperature of Sydney top of the list, which was 25 degree. It remained stable next two years, Afterwards, a considerably decline was seen between March to july as compare to london and sydney. From july to December, it had been increased and fell again 25 degree as same pattern of begin. In case of london, the temperature was 10 degree in January. After that, there had been gradually rise observed in the following next five years as same pattern of new york. And in a same way, it was decreased next whole period. accounted for 10 degree. Moving on to New York, temperature was 5 degree it was slightly increase in march. Then, a sharp rise was observed from next five years and reached at 30 degree. Temperature was fell down as same fashion and climbed at 5 degree again july to December. Overall, it is evident that the temperature of sydney was at the peak rather than other cities.
The give graph provide data about
annually
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temperature
of
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london
,
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new york
and
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sydney
. It
is observed
that in the
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temperature
of Sydney top of the list, which was 25
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degree
. It remained stable
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next
two years, Afterwards, a
You used an adverb ('considerably') instead of an adjective, or a noun ('decline') instead of another adjective.
considerably decline
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
between March to
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july
as compare to
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london
and
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sydney
. From
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july
to December, it had
been increased
and fell again 25
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degree
as same pattern of
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begin
. In case of
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london
, the
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temperature
was 10
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degree
in January. After that, there had been
gradually
rise observed in the following
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next
five years as same pattern of
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
new york
. And
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in a same way
, it
was decreased
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next
whole period.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
accounted
for 10
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degree
. Moving on to New York,
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temperature
was 5
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degree
it was
slightly
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increase
in
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march
. Then, a sharp rise
was observed
from
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next
five years and reached at 30
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degree
.
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Temperature
was fell down as same fashion and climbed at 5
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degree
again
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july
to December.

Overall
, it is evident that the
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temperature
of
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sydney
was at the peak
rather
than other cities.
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IELTS academic The graph below information about Monthly temperature of major three cities.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
180 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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