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The graph below gives information about international tourist arrivals in five countries. v.2

The graph below gives information about international tourist arrivals in five countries. v. 2
The given graph compares the number of international tourists in 5 different countries from 1995 to 2010. Generally speaking, the USA had the highest number of international tourists among these countries, and the number of tourists who visited France during this period increased rapidly. So, France as a tourist destination become more popular over time. Initially, in 1995, more than 70 million international tourists travelled the USA while just above 30 million tourists travelled to France. Brazil and Egypt had less than 10 million tourists this year compared to the just above 20 million tourists in Malaysia. Over the period, the total tourists visited these 5 countries increased with some slight fluctuations. In 2005, tourists to the USA reached 90 million which was the highest among these countries. In this year, international tourists' number in France was about 65 million which was a sharp increase compared to its previous international tourists’ number. In Malaysia, Brazil and Egypt, tourists' number increased but did not exceed 40 million. Finally, in 2010, international tourists' number in the USA and France intersected at about 90 million. Compared to the previous years, France gained the highest ratio of international tourists. This number also increased in Malaysia and reached over 45 million which is almost double compared to the data in 1995. Brazil and Egypt had the least number of international tourists among the given five countries, and in 2010, they both had around 25 million international tourists.
The
given
graph compares the
number
of
international
tourists
in 5
different
countries
from 1995 to 2010.

Generally
speaking, the USA had the highest
number
of
international
tourists
among these
countries
, and the
number
of
tourists
who visited France during this period
increased
rapidly
.
So
, France as a
tourist
destination become more popular over time.

Initially
, in 1995, more than 70
million
international
tourists
travelled the USA while
just
above 30
million
tourists
travelled to France. Brazil and Egypt had less than 10
million
tourists
this year compared to the
just
above 20
million
tourists
in Malaysia. Over the period, the total
tourists
visited these 5
countries
increased
with
some
slight fluctuations.

In 2005,
tourists
to the USA reached 90
million
which was the highest among these
countries
. In this year,
international
tourists'
number
in France was about 65
million
which was a sharp increase compared to its previous
international
tourists’
number
.
In
Malaysia, Brazil and Egypt, tourists'
number
increased
but
did not exceed 40
million
.
Finally
, in 2010,
international
tourists'
number
in the USA and France intersected at about 90
million
. Compared to the previous years, France gained the highest ratio of
international
tourists
. This
number
also
increased
in Malaysia and reached over 45
million
which is almost double compared to the data in 1995. Brazil and Egypt had the least
number
of
international
tourists
among the
given
five
countries
, and in 2010, they both had around 25
million
international
tourists
.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
51Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS academic The graph below gives information about international tourist arrivals in five countries. v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
242 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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