Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The given line graph tell us about the time young children spend on watching TV and using computer over a span of time

The given line graph tell us about the time young children spend on watching TV and using computer over a span of time 2bNLw
The given line graph tell us about the time young children spend on watching TV and using computer over a span of time. It can be seen that initially in 2000 TV was most popularly used at 22 hours, On the other hand computer had not yet taken off with usages level being 3 hours a week. it is noticed that the computer usages grew significantly to reach the 15 hours mark by 2003. TV on other hand experienced a slightly fall followed by a fluctuation and by 2003 both TV and computer were equally used at at 15 hours. The computer usages grew relatively to around 22 hours per week in present. In conclusion it can be stated that today computer are more popular.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
line graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
us about the time young children spend on watching TV and using computer over a span of time.

It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that
initially
in 2000 TV was most
popularly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
at 22
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
,
On the other hand
computer had not
yet
taken off with usages level being 3
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
a week.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is noticed
that the computer usages grew
significantly
to reach the 15
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
mark by 2003.

TV on other hand experienced a
You used an adverb ('slightly') instead of an adjective, or a noun ('fall') instead of another adjective.
slightly fall
followed by a fluctuation and by 2003 both TV and computer were
equally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
Possible typo: you repeated a word
at at
15
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
. The computer usages grew
relatively
to around 22
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
per week in present.

In
The comma is probably missing here: "conclusion, it".
conclusion it
can
be stated
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
computer are more popular.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS academic The given line graph tell us about the time young children spend on watching TV and using computer over a span of time

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
125 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 6band
    The olympics medal winners of all time in summer and winter has been illustrated as charts
    The bar chart illustrates the countries having gained the most number of medals, containing gold, silver and bronze in Winter Olympics, while the total number of medals achieved in Summer Olympic has been illustrated as a line graph. Whilst Norway has been the most flourishing country in the Winter ...
  • 6band
    The two maps belo show change to Melvin island between 2000 and 2010.
    The maps illustrates the redevelopment Melvin island from 2000 to 2010. Overall, majority of changes were taken place in the Melvin island not more facilities available but in 2010 improve more facilities. To begin with, the north west area in the motel and garages of the island in 2000 but in 2010 ...
  • 6band
    Pie chart description in 150 words
    The pie charts show the amount of revenue and expenditures in 2016 for a children’s charity in the USA. Overall, it can be seen that donated food accounted for the majority of the income, while program services accounted for the most expenditure. Total revenue sources just exceeded outgoings. In de...
  • 6band
    summarize the given informations
    The given graph demonstrate the total number of bananas imported to 4 nations(Japan, France, German and USA) over a period of 8 years between 1996 and 2004. Overall, it is explicitly apparent that for most of the period, the price of bananas was very high in Japan, while the least the price was in ...
  • 5.5band
    The maps below show the center of a small town called slip from 2010 to 2015.
    The provided set of charts illustrate the changes that took place in the center of a small town named IsIip between 2010 and 2015. Overall, it is apparent from the maps that the area has witnessed several development over the five year period. The area was completely transformed with the addition o...
  • 5.5band
    The chart below shows the sale of cars and trucks in Italy from 2001 to 2008.
    The line graph illustrates the data of number of cars and trucks which were sold between 2001। and 2008 in Italy. To conclude, the cars had been sold at highest rate since the given time frame, while the trucks had minimum numbers in the sale. It is clear that, In the beginning, the sale of cars wit...





Get more results for topic:
  • The given line graph tell us about the time young children spend on watching TV and using computer over a span of time