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The given line graph illustrates about the comparison of Average weekly earning of both genders graduate and non graduates

The given line graph illustrates about the comparison of Average weekly earning of both genders graduate and non graduates pR039
The given line graph illustrates about the comparison of Average weekly earning of both genders graduate and non graduates. it can be seen that the both genders age range 16 to 19 on graduate on lowest income white 200 pounds although it can notice that the 20 to 24 age group of male graduates and non graduate average weekly earnings 350 Pounds where women same age group stands more than 300 pounds. however the income of male gender in the age of 25 to 29 heroes nearly 500 pounds and also women in the age 25 to 29 graduates 410 pounds average weekly earnings. on the other hand to last levels men (42 to 49 and 50 to 59) reached higher earning by graduates approximately 710 pounds in the meanwhile the age group of women 40 to 59 stands at 300 Pounds graduates average weekly earnings. overall working age ranges for men and women shows that the most of highest average income in a week is dominated by males in both graduate and non graduate category.
The
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given
line graph illustrates about the comparison of
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Average
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weekly
earning of both genders
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graduate
and non graduates.

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it
can be
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seen
that the both genders
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age
range 16 to 19 on
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graduate
on lowest income white
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200 pounds
although it can notice that the 20 to 24
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age
group of male
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graduates
and non
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weekly
earnings 350 Pounds where
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women
same
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age
group stands more than
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300 pounds
.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
however
the income of male gender in the
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age
of 25 to 29 heroes
nearly
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500 pounds
and
also
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women
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
25 to 29
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduates
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
410 pounds
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weekly
earnings.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the other hand to last levels
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
(42 to 49 and 50 to 59) reached higher earning by
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graduates
approximately
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
710 pounds
in the meanwhile the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
40 to 59 stands at 300 Pounds
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weekly
earnings.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
overall
working
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age
ranges for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and
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women
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that the most of
A determiner is probably missing here: "the highest".
highest
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average
income in a week
is dominated
by males in both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduate
and non
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduate
category.

IELTS academic The given line graph illustrates about the comparison of Average weekly earning of both genders graduate and non graduates

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
176 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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