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the given couple of bar charts depicts the major reason for education among the learners of various age groups and the quantity of help the received from senior .

the given couple of bar charts depicts the major reason for education among the learners of various age groups and the quantity of help the received from senior. Xy5aP
it is axiomatic that mostly people study for the pursuing their career at a cursory glance the most striking set of statistics reveals that 80% learners learn to create better career while only 26% students learn for their interest and 21% it is received aid from their employers under 26. Moreover under 26 to 29 only 15% tutee learn for their interest but 69% students learn for creating better career. Under 26 to 29 15% add is a received from their seniors however under more than half students study tobetter career one quarters of learners study for creating better career and 35% help is received from their seniors. probing to vote for their description it can be observed that under 4249 41% learn from there interest and same amount of students learn for better career 39% help is received from their seniors while under 49 approximate one fifth study for their career but 70% learn for creating better career 45% it is a received from their seniors. To aggregate it can be deduced that over 49, mostly people per learn for their interest
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is axiomatic that
mostly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
for the pursuing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
at a cursory glance the most striking set of statistics reveals that 80% learners
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
to create
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
while
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
26%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
and 21% it is
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received
aid from their employers under 26.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
under 26 to 29
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
15%
Possible spelling mistake found.
tutee
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learn
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
69%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
for creating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
. Under 26 to 29 15%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
is a
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received
from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seniors
however
under more than half
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students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
Possible spelling mistake found.
tobetter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
one quarters of learners
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
for creating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
and 35%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
received
from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seniors
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
probing
to vote for their description it can
be observed
that under 4249 41%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
from there
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
and same amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
39%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
received
from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seniors
while under 49 approximate one fifth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
70%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
for creating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
45% it is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
received
from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seniors
. To aggregate it can
be deduced
that over 49,
mostly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
for their
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
interest
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IELTS academic the given couple of bar charts depicts the major reason for education among the learners of various age groups and the quantity of help the received from senior.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
182 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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