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The given column graph compares the amount of money spent by five age groups of the British citizens on three different items, in the year 2004.

The given column graph compares the amount of money spent by five age groups of the British citizens on three different items, in the year 2004. G7kL
The given column graph compares the amount of money spent by five age groups of the British citizens on three different items, in the year 2004. It is interesting to note that the spending on food and drinks was the least by the under 30s, and the highest by the above 76 age group. It is noticeable that the largest proportion of spending went on food and drinks in most age groups, except for the under 30s and those between 61 and 75 years of age. Expenditure on restaurant and hotel was almost similar among all age groups below 60 years. They spent 12-14% on this sector. The 61-75 and the 76+ age groups spent 2% and 7% respectively on restaurant and hotel. The under 45s spent lesser on entertainment than on restaurant and hotel, but the vice versa was true for all the other given age groups. The 61-75 year olds, showed the highest discrepancy in their spending on these two areas. They spent 2% and 23% on restaurant and hotel, and entertainment respectively. Overall, it is observed that as age advanced, the spending priorities of people changed. Older age groups spent more on food and drink and entertainment.
The
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given
column graph compares the amount of money
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spent
by five
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age
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groups
of the British citizens on three
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different
items, in the
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year
2004. It is interesting to note that the
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spending
on food and drinks was the least by the under 30s, and the highest by the above 76
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age
group.

It is noticeable that the largest proportion of
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spending
went on food and drinks in most
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age
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groups
,
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except for
the under 30s and those between 61 and 75 years of
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age
. Expenditure on
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restaurant
and
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hotel
was almost similar among all
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age
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groups
below 60 years. They
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spent
12-14% on this sector. The 61-75 and the 76+
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age
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groups
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spent
2% and 7%
respectively
on
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restaurant
and
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hotel
. The under 45s
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spent
lesser on entertainment than on
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restaurant
and
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hotel
,
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but
the vice versa was true for all the other
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given
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age
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groups
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
61-75
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year
olds,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
the highest discrepancy in their
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spending
on these two areas. They
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spent
2% and 23% on
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restaurant
and
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hotel
, and entertainment
respectively
.

Overall
, it
is observed
that as
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age
advanced, the
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spending
priorities of
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
.

Older
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age
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groups
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spent
more on food and drink and entertainment.

IELTS academic The given column graph compares the amount of money spent by five age groups of the British citizens on three different items, in the year 2004.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
200 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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