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The given bar chart compares the money spent on different consumer goods by the people of four European countries namely Britain, France, Italy and Germany.

The given bar chart compares the money spent on different consumer goods by the people of four European countries namely Britain, France, Italy and Germany. q9jD
The given bar chart compares the money spent on different consumer goods by the people of four European countries namely Britain, France, Italy and Germany. As is observed from the illustration, British spent more money on those consumer goods while Germans spent the least to buy them. As is given in the bar graph, British people spent more than 170 thousand pound sterling for photographic films which is the highest amount spent on any consumer good by them as well as than other countries. British people also spent more than 160 thousand pound sterling for purchasing Toys and CDs, which is more than any other given nation. For perfumes, Tennis racquets and personal stereos they spent more than other nations as well. On the other hand, French people spent around 165 thousand pound sterling on purchasing photographic films which makes it the highest amount they spent on consumer goods. They spent about 158 thousand on Toys which is a tie with the Italian people. For photographic films, toys and CDs, their spending totalled second highest among the given four nations. Finally, they spent less than 150 thousand on remaining consumer goods. Italian citizens spent around 150 thousand on personal stereos, tennis racquets and CDs while they spent about 5 thousand more on photographic films and toys. Finally, German people spent less in all consumer good items than any other nation and their average spending was 145 thousand which is less than the other nations.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
bar chart compares the money
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
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consumer
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goods
by the
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people
of four European countries
namely
Britain, France, Italy and Germany. As
is observed
from the illustration, British
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spent
more money on those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
while Germans
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
the least to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
them.

As is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
in the bar graph, British
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
more than 170 thousand pound sterling for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
photographic
films which is the highest amount
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
by them
as well
as than
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other
countries. British
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people
also
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spent
more than 160 thousand pound sterling for purchasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Toys
and CDs, which is more than any
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other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
. For perfumes, Tennis racquets and personal stereos they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
more than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
as well
. On the
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other
hand, French
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people
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spent
around 165 thousand pound sterling on purchasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
photographic
films which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it the highest amount they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
.

They
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spent
about 158 thousand on
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Toys
which is a tie with the Italian
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people
. For
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photographic
films,
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toys
and CDs, their spending
Possible spelling mistake. 'totalled' is British English.
totalled
second highest among the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
four
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nations
.
Finally
, they
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spent
less than 150 thousand on remaining
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consumer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
. Italian citizens
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spent
around 150 thousand on personal stereos, tennis racquets and CDs while they
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spent
about 5 thousand more on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
photographic
films and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
toys
.
Finally
, German
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people
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spent
less in all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
items than any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
and their average spending was 145 thousand which is less than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
.

IELTS academic The given bar chart compares the money spent on different consumer goods by the people of four European countries namely Britain, France, Italy and Germany.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
244 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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