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The diagram shows how electricity is generated by a hydroelectric dam.

The given diagram illustrates the basic principles of producing electricity through a hydroelectric dam. Overall, it can clearly be seen that the element that is crucial in this procedure is water, which is a renewable energy. The water is trapped in a reservoir before entering the process. The process entails some essential devices such as a generator, penstock, turbine and a long distance power lines. The process starts with loading the water to the system through an intake which is connected to a long pipe called a pension. After which, the water is transferred to a generator with the pressure of a turbine underneath it. The generator, which is powered by the powerhouse, is where the process of turning water into electricity happens. The resulting electricity is then moved into a long distance power lines in order to be distributed to wherever the power is needed.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
diagram illustrates the basic principles of producing electricity through a hydroelectric dam.
Overall
, it can
clearly
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the element
that is
crucial in this procedure is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
, which is a renewable energy. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is trapped
in a reservoir
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
entering the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
entails
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
essential devices such as a generator,
Possible spelling mistake found.
penstock
, turbine and a long distance power lines.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
with loading the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
to the system through an intake which
is connected
to a long pipe called a pension. After which, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is transferred
to a generator with the pressure of a turbine underneath it. The generator, which
is powered
by the powerhouse, is where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
of turning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
into electricity happens. The resulting electricity is then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
into a long distance power lines in order to
be distributed
to wherever the power
is needed
.
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IELTS academic The diagram shows how electricity is generated by a hydroelectric dam.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
146 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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