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The diagram below shows the stages and equipment used in the cement-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building purposes.

The diagram below shows the stages and equipment used in the cement-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building purposes. ep1G
The rendered process diagram illustrates the making of cement and concrete for building. There are two parts: part one includes the making of cement whereas the part two involves production of concrete. Overall, after several production stages cement and concreted re evolved and the cement is used for the manufacturing of the concrete. In detail, limestone and clay are tipped into a crusher to form a sleek powder. This powder is fed into a mixer. After that, it is placed in a rotating heater to generate some heat. The mixture is then grinded with the help of a grinder. A pure quality of cement is then produced and put into the bags. In the subsequent stage, proper proportions of cement, water, sand and gravel(15%, 10%, 25%, 50%) are mixed and kept in the concrete mixer. The mixer then grinds everything to form a smooth paste of concrete. The concrete and cement are then used for the buildings.
The rendered process diagram illustrates the making of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
and concrete for building. There are two parts: part one includes the making of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
whereas the part two involves production of concrete.
Overall
, after several production stages
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
and concreted re evolved and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for the manufacturing of the concrete. In detail, limestone and clay
are tipped
into a crusher to form a sleek powder. This powder
is fed
into a mixer. After that, it
is placed
in a rotating heater to generate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
heat. The mixture is then
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "ground", the past tense form of the verb 'grind'?
grinded
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of a grinder. A pure quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
is then produced and put into the bags. In the subsequent stage, proper proportions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
, water, sand and gravel(15%, 10%, 25%, 50%)
are mixed
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
in the concrete mixer. The mixer then grinds everything to form a smooth paste of concrete. The concrete and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
are then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for the buildings.
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IELTS academic The diagram below shows the stages and equipment used in the cement-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building purposes.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
157 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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