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The diagram below shows the process of generating electricity from coal

The diagram below shows the process of generating electricity from coal RkqJo

The diagram illustrates how electricity is generated from coal. Overall, the process has nine stages, beginning with the supply of coal and ending with the disposal of ash. First, the supply of coal goes into a pulverizer, a machine which breaks the coal into powder. Then, the dust from pulverizing the coal is collected before it enters the boiler and it is collected in a stack for emission. The powder, however, is burned and it is used to heat water in a boiler, to produce steam. Next, steam from the boiler enters a pipe which connects with a turbine. The steam drives the turbine which spins a generator to create electricity in the substation/transformer. Ash from burning the coal dust is collected from the boiler, ready for disposal. The steam used to drive the turbine is then cooled, and it is condensed back into water using a cooling system. Finally, this water is returned to the boiler and the process begins again.

The diagram illustrates how electricity is generated
 from coal.

Overall
, the process has nine stages, beginning with the supply of coal and ending with the disposal of ash.

First
, the supply of coal goes into a pulverizer, a machine which breaks the coal into powder. Then, the dust from pulverizing the coal is collected
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:previouslyprior to
before
 it enters the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withheaterheating system
boiler
 and it is collected
 in a stack for emission. The powder, however
, is burned
 and it is This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exploited
used
 to heat water in a You use this word too often, consider replacing it withheaterheating system
boiler
, to produce steam. Next
, steam from the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withheaterheating system
boiler
 enters a pipe which connects with a turbine. The steam drives the turbine which spins a generator to create electricity in the substation/transformer. Ash from burning the coal dust is collected
 from the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withheaterheating system
boiler
, ready for disposal. The steam This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exploited
used
 to drive the turbine is then cooled, and it is condensed
 back into water using a cooling system. Finally
, this water is returned
 to the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withheaterheating system
boiler
 and the process This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :initiatescommences
begins
 again. 

IELTS academic The diagram below shows the process of generating electricity from coal

Academic

American English

3 paragraphs

162 words

6.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
?
One main idea per paragraph
?
Include an introduction and conclusion
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Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
?
Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resource: 6.0

Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 6.5

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 7.0

Answer all parts of the question
?
Present relevant ideas
Fully explain these ideas
?
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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