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The diagram below shows the hydro-electric power generation process, which is used to create electricity from the movement of water.

The diagram below shows the hydro-electric power generation process, which is used to create electricity from the movement of water. r6rlo
The diagram provides a process f the stages in generating electricity from the movement of water. This process begins with the natural water cycle and ends with power being provided to buildings. To begin with, solar energy heats the ocean's water, causing it to evaporate. When it is the time rain, the water will eventually drop down from the clouds and ends up into a reservoir. The water in this area with a dam, which has a valve that allows it to be opened and closed. When the valve is opened, the water flows down the hill and spins the turbine and producing power. At this moment the majority of the power is being sent through high-voltage cables and to a transformer station. From that transformer station, the electricity is sent to various places where it is needed. Another thing to bear in mind is that after the water has passed through the turbine, it is being pushed back into the reservoir using the extra power, therefore the water can be used to spin the turbines and generate again.
The diagram provides a process f the stages in generating electricity from the movement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
. This process
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
with the natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
cycle and ends with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
being provided
to buildings. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, solar energy heats the ocean's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
, causing it to evaporate. When it is the time rain, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
will
eventually
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "drop".
drop down
from the clouds and ends up into a reservoir. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
in this area with a dam, which has a valve that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
it to
be opened
and closed. When the valve
is opened
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
flows down the hill and spins the turbine and producing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
. At this moment the majority of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
is being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
through high-voltage cables and to a transformer station. From that transformer station, the electricity is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to various places where it
is needed
. Another thing to bear in mind is that after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
has passed through the turbine, it is
being pushed
back into the reservoir using the extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
,
therefore
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to spin the turbines and generate again.
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IELTS academic The diagram below shows the hydro-electric power generation process, which is used to create electricity from the movement of water.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
179 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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