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The diagram below shows part of the carbon cycle.

The diagram below shows part of the carbon cycle. jV7Mp
A glance at the given diagrams depicts the cycle of carbon through different stages from the beginning of the fossil fuel gas to the atmosphere and back again. The cycle commences with oil and coal, which are known as fossil fuels, are extracted by mining. These fuels are used for different purposes such as goods production, transports and electrical company after they pass a burning process. The next stage is when carbon dioxide is released into the atmosphere gas, which causes a part of global warming and natural disasters. At the same time, the Co2 is absorbed by trees in order to prepare for photosynthesis. This stage also makes Co2 reduce in the air. When Co2 absorption is reduced by tree clearance, tree decays are then transferred to produce fossil fuels. Once the final stage has been completed, the carbon cycle continues again with the first stage as fossil fuels.
A glance at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
diagrams depicts the cycle of carbon through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
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stages
from the beginning of the
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fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
gas to the atmosphere and back again.

The cycle commences with oil and coal, which
are known
as
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fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
,
are extracted
by mining. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
purposes such as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
production, transports and electrical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
after they pass a burning process.

The
next
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
is when carbon dioxide
is released
into the atmosphere gas, which causes a part of global warming and natural disasters. At the same time, the Co2
is absorbed
by trees in order to prepare for photosynthesis. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
Co2
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
in the air. When Co2 absorption is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
by tree clearance, tree decays are then transferred to produce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
fuels.

Once the final
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
has
been completed
, the carbon cycle continues again with the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
.
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IELTS academic The diagram below shows part of the carbon cycle.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
150 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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