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The chart shows information about British people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. The average age changed by percentage and years.

The chart shows information about British people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. The average age changed by percentage and years. kxLx2
It can be seen that in 1990, over 40 % of British people between 36-50 years donated money to charity. While in 2010 over 35% of people by the age of 51-65 gave money to charity. This illustration of the chart shows that in both years, people from 18-50 who donated increased. Following the number of people who are below average, it can be seen that those by 18-25 donated less money. However, comparing this it reveals that still, those young people from 1990 gave more money, about 17% in comparison to the people from 2010 who donated below 10%. In 1990 and 2010, regarding the percentage scale, the number of people who gave money are those between 36-65, which is above 30 % of the total of 45%. Overall, the chart demonstrates that young people are not as interested in donating money to charity as older people. However, there are not many differences between the age range for the years 1990 and 2010 only in some cases.
It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that in 1990, over 40 % of British
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
between 36-50 years
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
donated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to charity.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
in 2010 over 35% of
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people
by the age of 51-65 gave
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money
to charity. This illustration of the chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that in both years,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from 18-50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
donated
increased. Following the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are below average, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that those by 18-25
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
donated
less
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money
.
However
, comparing this it reveals that
still
, those young
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people
from 1990 gave more
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money
, about 17%
in comparison
to the
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people
from 2010
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
donated
below 10%.

In 1990 and 2010, regarding the percentage scale, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
gave
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
are those between 36-65, which is above 30 % of the total of 45%.

Overall
, the chart demonstrates that young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not as interested in donating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to charity as older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
However
, there are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
differences between the age range for the years 1990 and 2010
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases.
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IELTS academic The chart shows information about British people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. The average age changed by percentage and years.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
168 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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