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The chart below shows the value of one country’s exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015.

The bar chart illustrates the amounts of export incomes in five different classified goods and the table also shows the changing percentages in these products in one country between the years 2015 and 2016. Overall, in the both years, the most significant products were petroleum products and engineered goods, which accounted for over half of other products. Whereas, textiles contributed the least number of percentages in 2015. Both petroleum and engineered goods rose slightly of the export revenue to over 60 percent in 2016, which increased 3 percent and 8. 5 percent respectively. While the proportions of textiles were a substantial growth of 5. 18 percent and this figure rose to around 32 percent in 2016. On the other hand, there were a gradually decrease in products of gems and jewelry, which fell to nearly 40 percent in 2016 from around 42 percent in 2015. In terms of agricultural goods remained relatively constant in both years at over 30 percent.
The bar chart illustrates the amounts of export incomes in five
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
classified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
and the table
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the changing percentages in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in one country between the years 2015 and 2016.

Overall
, in the both years, the most significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
were petroleum
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products
and engineered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
, which accounted for over half of other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, textiles contributed the least number of percentages in 2015.

Both petroleum and engineered
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goods
rose
slightly
of the export revenue to over 60
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percent
in 2016, which increased 3
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
and 8. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
respectively
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
the proportions of textiles were a substantial growth of 5. 18
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percent
and this figure rose to around 32
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
in 2016.

On the other hand
, there were a
You used an adverb (‘gradually’) instead of an adjective, or a noun (‘decrease’) instead of another adjective.
gradually decrease
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
of gems and jewelry, which fell to
nearly
40
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percent
in 2016 from around 42
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
in 2015. In terms of agricultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
remained
relatively
constant in both years at over 30
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
.
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IELTS academic The chart below shows the value of one country’s exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
160 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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